The Wolfs Heart
by crazyasssoul
Summary: She sat alone in the darkness. It was a battle she was losing, unsure of anything. Could she face the man that condemned her? THERE MAY BE SOME SPOILERS SO WARNING. I ALSO SUCK AT SUMMARIES. SOLAS/INQUISITOR PAIRING. RATED M FOR LATER CHAPTERS. FIRST TIME POSTING IN A COUPLE YEARS, SORRY FOR ANY TYPOS, ETC.
1. Chapter 1

_**"I'm sorry, Vhenan.." He bent down and kissed her, there was so much passion, but there was sadness, it was a goodbye. She could feel him pulling the power out of her. Slowly he turned and walked away, she saw the sorrow and loneliness. Everything around them started to fade, but she never stopped watching him and just as everything was about to disappear, he looked at her over his shoulder.**_

 _ **Betrayed. Hurt. Lies. The voice rang in her head. Repeating over and over.**_

She didn't remember much. It was the last thing she remembered, and of course it was of him. It had been just over a year since the defeat of Corypheus and the realization that Solas, or Fen'Harel, had planned most of it. She stared at her hands, there  
was a scar where the mark used to be. She noted how the chains had marked her skin, scabbing from the time she spent here. They all tell the same story every time she asks, though she stopped asking long ago.

She had appeared in front of the broken eluvian, hunched over and barley conscious, her left hand was bleeding immensely from where the mark used to be. When they had approached her to ask what happened, she started attacking. No warning, and no signs  
of corruption. It was as though she was in a blood haze. She had killed some guards before Bull had knocked her unconscious. They had put her in her room at first, but when she awoke she began attacking again. They finally had her moved to the dungeon  
and shackled her hands together.

She had been in this darkened room fora little over ayear. Her once short hair was now long and thin, it was a tangled mess that fell to the middle of her back. Her clothes were tattered and dirty. Her skin that was tanned from months being  
on the road, was now pale. Once the hero of the land, now one of the most feared elves in Thedas. For monthspeoplecame to visit, and after awhile, the visits slowly became far and few between. Now it was just one of the soldiersthat  
would come in to give her food.

She remembered asking one of the guards to kill her, just be done and over with it. She felt nothing anymore, there was a darkness in her that stirred. Told her to break free, destroy everything in her path, but she knew it would solve nothing, just bring  
more pain and suffering, something she fought for and vowed would never happen again. The hardest was sleeping. She did not dream anymore, it was just blackness, nothing came to her dreams or nightmares. She thought about returning to the fade, but  
she couldn't taint the fade that she tried so hard to mend. So instead she stayed in the darkness. Her ears twitched, she could hear footsteps coming down the hall. They were short, heavy strides. She lifted her head and turned it towards the door,  
hoping to get a better angle to hear. The voice was faint, but she recognized the voice, Varric. She chuckled to herself and let her head hang again. It had been months since his last visit. With a moan, the door slowly opened, but she kept her head  
down. He stepped closer, knowing how far her reach was, he stopped just short.

"Hey Sailor." She didn't meet his gaze, just sat in silence. "Still playing the tough gal?" He gave a soft chuckle. He looked over at her plate, it looked as though it hadn't been touch, letting out a soft sigh he picked up the plate and moved to her,  
knowing how risky it was, but he was concerned more than anything. He sat in front of her, pushing the plate in front of her hands. "You have to eat." Finally she looked up at him, he was giving her a soft smile, she noticed that Bianca wasn't anywhere.  
Meeting his gaze, sudden rage started to fill her, she moved back, hearing the rattling of the chains she realized she was shaking.

"go.." Her voice was barley a whisper, she brought her knees up to her chest and buried her head, letting her hair fall around her. "I don't want to hurt anyone….. Just go…" She sounded broken, no tears came though, they haven't since Solas walked away  
from her. Hearing shuffling, she peered through and saw him sitting in front of her again, holding the plate of food.

"The fact you're not lunging at me now, shows improvement. I can see you restraining yourself." He went to reach out to her, but instinctively he brought his hand back. She watched him, a range of emotions ran across his face. From sadness, anger, to  
a faint bit of happiness. The anger slowly disappeared, it lingered, but it wasn't consuming.

"I'm sorry I have not been around." Sadness crept across his face.

"No one has." She brought her gaze to the floor. "It's been months. I just see the guards now, though I haven't actually looked at them. I don't blame them. From hero to villain." she gave a chuckle.

"We've all been a villain at one point in our lives."

"where are the others?" Lifting her head she kept her gaze on her hands. This was the most someone stayed around her, the most anyone talked to her. For a long time there was always some sort of mage poking, casting spells, they were tormenting her, trying  
to figure out was wrong, never getting the answer.

"Most have stayed here in Skyhold. Leliana, Josephine, Sera, Bull, Dorian and myself. Cullen is helping other soldiers who were victims to Lyrium. Cassandra is in the Hunterhorn mountains rebuilding the Seekers. Sera is travelling, not sure where she  
goes but she does send letters. Vivienne now runs a college for all mages to attend, though she is very strict about who gets to get in, no magic for harm type deal." He gave her a soft smile. "The only one we rarely see is Cole, he returned to the  
fade not long after, he comes around every now and again." It was the most brief answer she could have gotten from him, but she didn't blame him.

"what about…." She couldn't say his name, at least out loud that is.

"There is no sign of him. Has no one told you or spoken to you about this?" Genuine concern laced his features.

"when people came to visit it was mostly to poke and prod. Always demanding things from me. They kept their secrets to themselves. Eventually they all stopped coming. You're the first in months. I don't blame you all though. I've turned into the thing  
we fought hard against." This time he did touch her, he placed a hand on her shoulder, it gripped lightly.

"You are not Corypheus. I would strike down anyone who speaks otherwise." She gave a crooked smile.

"Then would you strike me down?" He flinched as though she had slapped him. He now gave her a slight shake.

"You. Are. Not. Corypheus." There was defiance in his voice. Releasing her, he sat back and pinched the bridge of his nose. "The elven tribes are disappearing. After a couple weeks of you being in here, suddenly the elves were disappearing, vanishing  
in the night. We could only assume it's him. Very few tribes remain now. We don't know why."

"He plans to bring them all back to Arlathan. To destroy the veil. He wants to bring back his people, destroying this world in the process." She felt the pang in her heart for the first time in a long time. The feeling of abandonment, of loss. He would  
destroy this world, along with her in it. He claimed he loved her while he planned to destroy her. Anger began to rise again. _Betrayed. Lies._ The voice rang in her ears. It was a familiar voice. She didn't know who it was, but it was making  
the anger rise. She pulled on the chains bringing them to her. She looked at Varric with desperation. "run.." He didn't move. Just sat there, confused. "VARRIC RUN!" Her voiced boomed in the room. He finally stood and walked to the edge of the room,  
standing there with his arms crossed. She was now seething in anger. _Betrayed. Lies. Hurt._ She lunged at him, the chains pulling her back, stopping her from reaching him. She was desperately trying to reach him, her arms moaning in protest.  
He did not move, he didn't flinch, he just stood there, making her more angry with every passing moment.

"I've been travelling you know." He leaned against the stone wall, watching her as she kept trying to reach for him. "Been to the farthest parts of towns, cities and encampments. Trying to find some answers, anything. It was on my way back, Cole appeared  
out of no where, as he usually does. Still wears that damn hat you know." He gave a soft chuckle. The anger was still there, but she was know kneeling on the ground glaring at him. "He said he had found a part of an answer. He never made much sense.  
Said he searched the fade, furthest parts he could, talked to as many spirits that would talk to him. Told them about you and if they knew why. They think there's a reason you are the way you are." He pushed off the wall and headed for the door. He  
didn't look back at her. "You just have to wait a little longer." With that he left.

Her body was shaking, pain and anger rang throughout her entire body. The voice kept repeating the same words over and over again. She pulled, twisted and clawed at the chains. Finally her body started to become exhausted, everything started to slow and  
seem less urgent. She allowed herself to fall to her hands. There was no way to fix this, she was broken.

 _Broken…. Yes… Broken… Pain… Lots of pain…_

-x-

The next couple weeks had passed like they normally do. The voice in her head telling her what she already knew, the guards coming and going with her food that she barley touch, and then left alone in the darkness, letting in consume her like it normally  
does.

She was in the furthest corner of the room, the chains were slightly tugging at her, but she remained in the corner, knees to her chest when she heard steps, one was light, as though trying to be heard and the others where heavy and short stride, Varric  
most likely. Taking a deep breath she ready herself for the two to come into the room, trying to maintain the anger the voice was trying to give her. She heard a couple of the guards raise their voice, there was a flash from under the door and loud  
thuds. Now she was curious but afraid. No one had attacked the guards since she was here. Bracing herself she tucked as much as she could into the corner, as much as the chains would allow her. The door opened and held her breath, she saw the familiar  
face.

"C-Cole?" Varric stood in the doorway, as though watching for other guards. He hissed at Cole in a low voice.

"Let's go fade boy, we don't have much time." He then disappeared out of the room.

Cole was in front of her, unlocking the chains but leaving the shackles on. He motioned for her to stand, when she didn't oblige he picked her up in a swift movement. He started walking towards the door, causing her to squirm in his arms, realizing for  
the first time, she was afraid to go outside. His grip only tightened.

"Trust me. Please." His eyes were pleading. The anger was building, the same darkness washing over her, before she could lash out Cole touched her forehead. Her body went limp in his arms. "Wrong, I know, but for safety." He nodded as if to give himself  
reassurance.

"Cole, we have to go now!" Varric was now running full speed at them with guards chasing him, swords drawn. He was beside them as Cole gave a flick of his wrist, causing green smoke to form around them, and with that, they were now at the Well of Sorrows.  
She tried to speak, but nothing was moving. Cole noticing put another finger to her forehead.

"Can talk but not move. Move head, yes. Body no." Cole placed her against a tree.

"What's going on? H-how…" It was then she noticed shadows coming out from behind the rocks. Panic set in until she recognized the faces of her fellow companions. Cassandra, Cullen, Dorian, Iron Bull, Josephine, Leliana, Sera and Vivienne. They gave her  
soft concerned smiles as they approached. She noticed for the first time, the voice had quieted and was now a tugging thought in the back of her mind, anger still lingered, but for the first time in almost 2 years she was her.

"By the maker, I didn't think you would be able to do it Varric." Cassandra stood with her arms crossed, staring at him.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence Seeker." He sneered at her.

"We don't have much time, they will suspect who took her." Leliana walked to her, placing a hand on her shoulder before turning to the others. "We need to go through as soon as possible. Cole, how long will it take to get the Eluvian working?"

"Night. Won't be around, but will open. Need time to not be interrupted." Cole pointed to a rock.

"Very well, should we put her back to sleep until we are ready?" Leliana gave her an apologetic look.

"No. Spell casted. Can't move body but can talk. Will be safe. Voice dulled. Well helping like said it would." With a quick nod he headed to the rock where he sat crossed legged and began softly chanting causing the eluvian to give off a soft light.

They all got comfy, bringing out there packs. Setting up a small camp. She watched them all, it was as if they were on another mission, as though nothing was different. It was Dorian who sat next to her, leaning against the tree.

"Must have a lot of question eh love?" He smiled at her. Giving her a soft nudge to the shoulder. "Ask away." Bull and Cassandra joined them. Bull sitting while Cassandra stood.

"Why?" Her voice was but a whisper but Dorian heard her.

"Why what?"

"After all this time?" She looked up at them, tears forming but not falling. "You all stopped coming. Allowed them to, to, to experiment on me, let me believe I was truly alone, especially after…." Her voice trailed off.

"It wasn't what we wanted." Bull stared at her. He was never one to look away. "The conclave was always watching us. We did fight in the beginning against them. Begged them really, which is something I don't do." He made a face of disproval.

"After what happened, they didn't want to take any chances and deemed that you were now tainted after everything. They still believed you were attached to the Anchor." Cassandra spoke, she always did sound as though she was insulting you, even when she  
didn't mean to. She noticed that her hair was a little longer, it was in a small pony tail, but wisps of hair were around her face. "So instead, we let them believe we had given up, in that process we had to let you believe to." She looked at the  
ground kicking the dirt.

"Believe us love. It is not at all what we tended, after everything you have done for Thedas, for us and our families." Dorian played with blades of grass as he continued. "It took longer than we wanted. But after 9 months or so, we managed to get in  
contact with Cole. Cole had been searching the fade for answers. It was about 2 months ago when he finally got one."

"What answers are you looking for?" She was confused. They had all let her believe they didn't want her anymore, that they had given up and allowed her to be consumed by the darkness that swelled inside her. Allowed the voice to continue to tell her how  
broken she was. "What does this place have anything to do with me?"

"Cole had asked around in the fade to all kinds of spirits what could have happened to make you, lash out, as you did. For awhile he said none would talk to him. Finally they slowly started coming forward, saying that a lone wolf was telling them to help."  
He smiled at her and quirked an eyebrow. "Seems as though you left a bigger mark on him than we all thought." He and Bull have a soft chuckle while Cassandra rolled her eyes.

"Why would he help after all this time? He's the one who made me like this!" Anger began to rise, and for the first time, it was her anger.

"We don't know why now. All we know is he gave us the answer. Loosely explained, when he took the Anchor, he didn't realize he was taking apart of your soul with it, and in that process, one of the corrupted managed to squeeze in. So in a way, this corrupted  
has been attached to you since you came through."

"How wouldn't he have known? He was there, right there! He would've felt it." Her anger kept rising.

"We don't know." He gave her a sad smile, as though he apologized for not having that answer. Closing her eyes she breathed in, attempting to calm herself.

"What does the Eluvian have to do with any of this?" She nodded her head towards the mirror.

"According to Cole and Solas, going back to the Ruins to the spot it happened, we should be able to pull the corrupted out."

"That's all fine, but wouldn't another one just take it's place?" He gave her a mischievous smile.

"That's where Solas comes into play." He breathed caught in her throat. "He said that we should all go through, place you where you saw him last then wait in the corridor. We're assuming he would like to see you alone." He gave a soft chuckled and waved  
his eyebrows at her. She let a small smile play across, he always found the odd things charming. But the smile faded as sadness washed over her, her eyes slowly watering causing Dorian to stop. "I'm sorry love, I thought you would be happy." He reached  
over and wiped her tears.

"He broke me, he made me like this. It doesn't matter if he fixes me, I will still always be broken in some way." Dorian brought her into his arms. It was the first time she had someone hold her in so long. It seemed foreign but it was comforting to know  
her friends had not given up on her. They sat in silence, he continued to hold her as the others prepared. She didn't cry, and he didn't ask her to, they just sat there with his arms around her. Waves of emotions kept going over her. She didn't know  
what to feel as she didn't let herself feel anything but anger. He kept playing with her hair, it was a simple but calming motion. Out of all of them though, Dorian was the only one to feel like family. Like an older protective brother. He pushed  
her when she needed it, but was always there to comfort her when things got bad, never faltering his loyalty to her. "Why didn't you visit?" Her voice was soft, filled with hurt and angst. She felt him flinch.

"If I had, I would have fought my way out of there with you in tow." He lifted her chin, so she was looking at him, he had tears in his eyes. "You were the one person who accepted me for who I was for the first time in my life without asking questions.  
Just like that, you were ok with it. You defending me when others would try to take me down. You became my family. True family." He brought her into a tighter hug. "I hated every day I did not see you. Knowing what they were doing, which is why I  
fought so hard to get you here now." It was now she wished she could move. She wanted desperately to hug him back. "I am letting you know now, that when I do see him, I will be knocking his handsome little ass out." This made her laugh, for the first  
time in a long time.

"Not before I do." They laughed together, causing the others to shake their heads at them. They sat like that until the sun went down. With a burst of light, the Eluvian came to life once again. Cole now stood, gracefully jumping off the rock and walking  
towards them.

"Ready. Must be fast, this side won't last long." He bent down to lift her, only to have her shake her head. "Can't let walk. Not until in ruins."

"Is it ok if Dorian carries me?" She didn't want to leave the comfort that she hadn't had in so long. Cole nodded his head.

"Must hurry." Dorian stood, giving his staff to Cole to hold onto. He knelt down, turning slightly to the side putting her arms around his neck, and fully turning so his back was facing her, slowly he stood, reaching around and hoisting her legs around  
his waist. She rested her head on his shoulder. She watched as her friends slowly disappeared through the mirror until it was just Dorian, herself and Cole. Cole gave them a smile as Dorian stepped through the mirror.

She blinked away the bright spots in her vision as she watched the ruins come into focus around her. It was just as breathtaking as it was the first time she came. As run down, and broken they were, she could only imagine how beautiful they were before.  
Behind them, Cole stepped through. They all walked in a brisk pace, following Cole through the maze of ruins, going through the Eluvians as she did before. A sudden fear washed over her. She had no idea what to feel or say when she saw him again.  
As though reading her thoughts, Dorian spoke.

"Just say what's on your mind. Don't worry about his feelings. Scream at him if you want. If you can't bring yourself to do anything, I'll march over and punch that smug elvish face of his." He turned his head and gave a giant smile causing her to give  
a small laugh.

They were now in front of the last mirror. The mirror to where she saw him turn the Quinari into stone. Where he took everything from her. She wasn't prepared for this, she never thought she would see him again.

"Rest stay here. We go through." Cole placed a finger on her forehead again. "Can move again." He brought out the key from his pockets and unlocked the shackles, a sense of relief washed over her wrists. They were bruised and scarred from how long they  
stayed on. Fresh scabs were still present, but it was nice to move without constraints. She gave Dorian a squeeze as the 3 of them walked through. It looked the same as before. Statues of stone around and off to the right was a small archway that  
overlooked the ruins. Slowly she slid off Dorians back, holding onto him until she was sure she could walk on her own.

"We must go now. Will be waiting on other side." Cole gave a brief nod before disappearing through the mirror.

"I will be right there. If anything happens, you shout and I will be at your side." She gave him a hug, before letting him go. He gave her a smile and he disappeared. Leaving her alone.

It was funny how no matter what happens, at some point she is left alone. Sighing to herself, she slowly made her way up to the arch, moving around the statues. She looked around, it was truly beautiful here. She understood why he wanted to restore it.  
She just didn't understand why he wanted to destroy everything to bring it back. There had to be another way. In the midst of her thoughts she miss-stepped, causing her to lose footing on the steps. She braced herself for impact, but she felt a pair  
hands catch her instead. They lifted her slowly, turning her around but she kept her eyes down, staring at the ground. The hands released her, it was then she realized she was holding her breath. It was when he spoke her anger rose.

"Ma Vhenan.." There was a loud noise. She felt her hand sting, looking at him she saw a faint red mark on his face. She had just slapped him. He didn't reach for his face, or back away, he just looked at her, sadness in his eyes. She felt the darkness  
crawl back in, her anger making her shake. The voice rang through her head, but this time is rang clear.

 _He betrayed you! He made you hurt! He left you behind, broken, in pain. Don't forgive him, kill him!_ She lunged at him, but he gracefully side stepped and grabbed her wrists, pinning them both behind her. She tried to break free, but his grip  
just held on tighter, causing her to hiss in pain. Hearing that his grip loosened just enough for her to push him away. Turning to him again. He wasn't looking at her, but at her wrists, shock played across his face. _Kill him!_ She lunged at  
him again, this time, he kept her facing him, holding her arms in the air. Staring at her wrists. It was as if she had no strength at all the way he was holding her still. She decided to try and kick him, only making him twist and kick her feet out  
from underneath her. Causing her to fall on her back with him kneeling above her, still holding her arms. She bucked and struggled, but it seemed not to faze him. He stared at her wrists a little longer, he gave a sigh and looked at her, his voice  
booming making her shrink into the stone beneath her.

"Enough." She stared at him his eyes were glowing a soft blue, causing her to stop moving. Anger seething in every fiber. "Calm yourself Vhenan."

"I am not your Vhenan." She spat the words with hatred and venom. He gave a slight flinch but didn't move.

"You are angry, I understand-" She started to struggle, twisting and moving every which way she could while screaming at him.

"NO YOU DON'T!" He tightened his legs, causing hers to stop moving. He gripped her arms tighter, careful not to touch her wrists. "You don't get to say you understand!" She watched him, his face now unmoving of any emotion. "You can't fix me Fen'Harel."  
She watched as a faint of anger came and went on him. She snickered which caused him to glare at her, this time though, she didn't flinch, she met his glare with her hatred one, she could feel herself give into the corrupted inside. It washed over  
her, finally, she let it have control. "The mighty wolf. Ha! You claim we make mistakes that are wicked, and maybe some are, but not as big as wiping your entire race. Condemning them to a mortal life as slaves for others." It was though she was watching  
through someone else's eyes. She saw the pain and agony play across his eyes. The corrupted kept talking, pretending to be her. Apart of her wanted to reach out, but she didn't know how. She just wanted everything to be over. It wouldn't matter if  
she was angry or sad, he wouldn't hear her. "You even condemned a fellow elf by the darkness you brought. You left her to rot in a cell, alone. Who was there for her? Have they told you what they did?"

"ENOUGH!" His voice rang loud, but it didn't faze the corrupted. Instead it laughed. Causing Solas to grip harder, she could see the anger in him, his eyes were now a full blue haze, he was bearing his teeth which now had fangs. There was black smoke  
swirling around him. It didn't stop the corrupted though.

"They locked her in a dungeon, no light to be seen. They experimented on her with everything their little incompentent minds could think of. Lyrium, spells, even a few devices. Which reminds me, you should see the scars she has." It laughed again as Solas  
growled at her. She then realized his hand was on her throat. "She ate enough just for her to pass by the days. She would pull at the chains, and after awhile, she stopped fighting." His hand tightened around her throat, she watched as slowly ears  
began to form. "She's not afraid to die, she welcomes death. It's a better fate than what you gave her." Solas faltered. Giving the corrupted enough time to get her arm free and punch him, causing him to fall away from her. She scrambled and realized  
where she was moving to. The cliff under the arch, turning she was facing him. The black smoke was violently whirling around him. He now had a tail which was wipping back and forth. Slowly he stood, turning to face her. Anger and fear laced his now  
wolf features. "Say goodbye dear wolf." She felt herself slowly fall back. She watched as he disappeared and reappeared in front of her, holding her by the throat. He was baring his teeth as he growled at her. Fear washed over her, realizing it was  
coming from the corrupted inside as well as her own.

Feeling her chance, she slowly brought her hands up to the one around her throat. He brought her closer, mere inches away from her, his breathing was heavy, he was grinding his teeth. He narrowed his eyes at her. Slowly the black smoke was surrounding  
him. She knew she was seeing him, his true form of Fen'Harel. She saw how broken he was, how alone he had been all these years, all the pain and anger he had. With his other hand, he placed it on her chest. She felt something tugging at her. _No! No! This isn't how it was suppose to happen!_ She  
could feel the corrupted clawing at her, trying to stay. After a quick movement of his hand it was suddenly gone. He held her there though, she could feel his hand tightening and loosening as if unsure what to do next. His dark form and blue eyes  
staring at her, the black smoke surrounding both of them. It was then she closed her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

This is from Solas's POV. If you're not liking this chapter, don't worry, it switches back to the Inquisitor after. Just thought his point up to it would be interesting. Sorry for any typo's

He walked through Haven. He knew where he was going, always did. That was the best part of being able to control the Fade, you could recreate memories. He walked up the hill, passing the buildings and up to the small house he always stood at. He let himself  
/smile as the memory unfolded.

They were now walking out of the room she was held when the breach first happened. Talking about how she was a mystery to him and that it frustrated him that he had no answers as to why a mortal could survive the anchor.

He was explaining how if he could not figure it out in time, he would have fled. Not the brightest plan in the world, which she had pointed out. Making them both laugh.

 _"It was when you closed the rift with a simple gesture and right then I felt the whole world change." He gave a soft smile._

 _"Felt the whole world change?" She placed a hand on her hip, giving a playful smile._

 _"It's a figure of speech." He looked at her, studying her features. Her short white hair was tussled in such a way it still fell around herfacegracefully. Her skin was lightly tanned with freckles dancing across her nose. Her lips were small, but there were plump, as though she had a small pout. But her eyes, how he adored them. They were a shade of lavender he had never seen. They played with her emotions, becoming darker or brighter._

 _"I am well aware of the metaphor." She stepped closer, he watched as her eyes became a darker shade. "I am more interested in felt." She was standing mere inches from him. He placed his hands behind his back afraid he would reach out to her._

 _"You… You change everything."_

 _"Sweet talker." She glanced down at her feet. Thinking the conversation was over he looked out towards Haven. He then felt her hand on his cheek, causing him to look at her, she then kissed him. It was sweet, soft and fast. She then moved to walk away. Without realizing he was reaching for her and spinning her around, bringing her in close, he kissed her. Deep with meaning. He kept his hands on her waist, firm, but gentle, keeping her close. Her hand snaked around the back of his neck drawing him close. It was then he realized what he was doing. Giving her another quick kiss, he pulled away, shaking his head._

 _"We shouldn't. It isn't right, not even here." He put distance between them, he was already craving more of her. He saw the confusion play across her face._

 _"What do you mean even here?" She looked around as though to search for a clue, causing him to smile that much more._

 _"Where do you think we were?" He was watching her._

 _"This….this isn't real?" She met his eyes, a soft smile played across her lips but he saw sadness in her eyes._

 _"That's a matter of debate." He stepped closer, bringing his lips to her ear. "Probably best discussed after you wake up."_

He watched as she vanished from the fade. He lingered a little longer, he already knew this would bring nothing but pain in the end, for both of them.

He watched as the memory disappeared. Sighing he walked away, he was now walking in a field of grass. A couple of tree's that appeared out of no where. He sat on his knee's, taking a deep breath. He hadn't felt her presence in the fade for just over a  
/year, he was still searching, hoping to get a glimpse of her or her dreams, something. He then felt a small tug on his shirt, veering him out of his thoughts, looking down he saw a spirit in the form of a little girl. She was a human girl with brown  
/hair and brown eyes. Freckles danced across her concerned face. He lifted her onto his lap.

"Are you lost little one?" She shook her head.

"My friend is looking for you." He froze for a quick second. She didn't seem to noticed so he smiled as best as he could.

"Which friend is that?"

"Cold? No.. Colt? No…" She was frowning trying to recall the name. He was already aware of the name she was trying to say.

"Cole?" Her face lit up which made his heart sink.

"Yes! He said he has a friend who's hurting. Hard name to say. It starts with Za. Said she's in a lot of pain. That her soul is hurting and not right." This little girl was thinking long and hard, trying to remember the conversation of the very confusing  
/Cole. Sighing he stood, the girl still in his arms.

"Did he say why he wanted my help?"

"Yes. Said you took something but something went in. I think… He talks funny." She wrinkled her nose in frustration. "Said to meet at mountain. Umm.. Sky…. Sky…" He placed her back on the ground.

"Skyhold?" She smiled and nodded.

"Yup. I have to go now, my mommy is calling." With that she waved good bye and as she ran in the distance, disappeared.

He groaned in frustration. Cole had been looking for him, but had he'd known it concerned her, Zathiria, he would've spoken sooner. With a quick flick of his wrist he brought himself to Skyhold. It seemed dead in the fade, it didn't have the same effect  
/when there were people buzzing about. He took his time walking through the grounds, making his way to the study he always worked out of. It was still faintly lit. Nothing seemed out of place and it made him wonder if in fact they had left everything  
/of his, waiting for his return. He brushed his fingers along the desk, lifting them to find his fingers caked in dust. There was a shift of presence and he knew Cole was there.

"Hello friend."

He smiled at the old spirit. He still wore the giant hat that hid most of his face. Cole wasn't smiling though, for the first time, the spirit had anger.

"What is it?"

"Friend. Zathiria. Needs help. Soon." Cole stared at him, his anger boring through.

"I understand she's in pain, but she will move on."

"No! Well, yes. But soul in trouble." His friend moved close, within arms length, startling him. "When took anchor, took part of Zathiria. Dark, very dark entered." Cole's gaze softened, sadness overwhelming his features. He placed a hand on his shoulder,  
/causing him to look up. "She got angry. Killed many. Now alone in dark."

"What do you mean? I was there when I took the anchor, I would have felt a spirit." Cole was shaking his head.

"Not spirit. Corrupted." He stared at his friend, fear came over him. How? How could he not have felt it.

"What have they done to her?" His voice was now booming in the empty room, but Cole didn't waver.

"We save her. You, save her. Take out corrupted. Place back soul that was lost." He was frustrated now, even if he could there was no way to be sure something else didn't enter her. It was risky. To risky. "Please. She does not go to fade. Think she will  
/corrupt what saved. Fears what you think." He placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"There is one place we could try." His voice was low, as though he was trying to convince himself out of it. "Take her if you can to the Well of Sorrows. You can replace the eluvian." He placed a hand on Cole's head, transferring knowledge, chants, and  
/spells. "The one spell will make her unable to move, the chant is for the mirror. You must not be interrupted. Best done for night, the moon will help the last bit of chanting. I will wait at the ruins. The last eluvian, place her and I will help,  
/but only her." His friend nodded, a broken smile. He watched as his friend disappeared, and slowly the fade melted away, bringing him back to the reality.

He slowly stood, walking down the corridor. He stood atop the archway, pain hitting his heart. It was the last place he saw her, saw her break. He had realized he was already acting even though he was against this from the begining.

-x-

A couple weeks had passed, causing him to worry. Unsure if he should leave and find them, or continue to wait. It was the moment he was about to walk through the eluvian he felt a shift in the air. They had made it. A smile played across his face. It  
/quickly disappeared as he realized how fast they were moving through the ruins. With a couple strides he stepped into the shadows behind the pillars, clear view of the mirror. A quick flash and he saw them, Cole, Dorian and her. His heart dropped  
/at the sight of her. Her hair was now long and tussled, her skin was now pale and she was skinnier. She seemed so frail.

"We must go now. Will be waiting on other side." Cole gave them both a nod before walking back.

"I will be right there. If anything happens, you shout and I will be at your side." Dorian and her gave each other a hug before he hesitantly walked away. He watch as her shoulders fell, she gave a quick look around before walking towards the arch.

He walked out from the shadows, making sure his footsteps weren't heard. She had reached the step, but her foot missed and she began to fall. Without realizing it he had caught her. He felt her stiffen under his touch, slowly he helped her stand and turned  
/her around. He saw the anger rise. He gave a soft smile.

"Ma Vhenan.." His face stung. He watched her register what she had done. But he remained still, this is the least of what he deserved. He watched her face, something was different. There was anger yes, but there was more to it. He watched as her body  
/lunged. He instinctively moved to the side grabbing both her hands holding them behind her. For her frail body, she still had that strength he admired. He gripped tighter as she tried to free herself, he then heard her his in pain, and for a brief  
/second he loosened his grip. He glanced down at her wrists as she pushed him away and turned around. He caught a glimpse of them. She lunged at him again, he was now getting impatient. He grabbed both arms again, careful not to grab her wrists, he  
/noticed the bruises, scarring and scabbing. He didn't understand, not fully. He could feel the frustration from her, and in a swift motion he moved to the side as she tried to kick him, he swept his foot behind both her legs cause her to fall back.  
/He then straddled her, pinning her legs with his and pinning her arms above her head. She was bucking and trying to free herself. He stared at her wrists a little longer before impatience over whelmed him. His voice came out harsher than he intended,  
/but it stopped her from moving.

"Enough." He could feel his own anger rising in him. She stared at him. "Calm yourself Vhenan."

"I am not your Vhenan." He flinched at her words, he could feel the hatred and the venom that came.

"You're angry. I understand-" She cut him off and started to struggle again, causing him to tighten his grip on her legs. Gripping her arms tighter, careful not to touch her wrists..

"NO YOU DON'T !You don't to say you understand!" He watched her, anger filled her, he could see it clear, there was something deep down in her, but he couldn't figure what it was. He then noticed her eyes held barley any colour left in them. "You  
can't fix me Fen'Harel." His anger flared at the name, the way she

said it. As quickly as it came, he pushed it back down. He heard her snicker, causing his anger to flickerback, glaring at her, he could see her retreating, allowing the corrupted to come forth. "The mighty wolf. Ha! You claim we make mistakes  
that

are wicked, and maybe some are, but not as big as wiping your entire race. Condemning them to a mortal life as slaves for others." Pain came but became over run by his anger, he could feel himself start to change as much as he willed it not to happen.  
/"You even condemned a fellow elf be taking by the darkness you brought. You left her to rot in a cell, alone. Who was there for her? Have they told you what they did?"

"ENOUGH!" He could feel himself getting angrier. This thing in her was laughing at him, laughing. He gripped harder, he felt his fangs come through, he bared them. The Fen'Harel starting to consume him. The black smoke slowly circling him. It didn't stop  
/it from speaking.

"They locked her in a dungeon, no light to be seen. They experimented on her with everything their little minds could think of. Lyrium, spells, even a few devices. Which reminds me, you should see the scars she has." It laughed again as he let out a growl,  
/his anger slowly taking control, his hand lacing around her throat while the other kept her hands pinned. "She ate enough just for her to pass by the days. She would pull at the chains, and after awhile, she stopped fighting." His hand tightened around  
/her throat, he felt himself turning into the wolf. "She's not afraid to die, she welcomes death. It's a better fate than what you gave her." He faltered, realizing that was enough time for it to punch him, causing him to lift off of her. He let the  
/anger take hold, the smoke violently whirling around him, his tail snapping back and forth. Slowly he stood and faced her, she was standing on the edge. "Say goodbye dear wolf." He watched as she began to fall back. With a quick fade side step, he  
/was in front of her in a flash, he held her by the throat. He was bearing his teeth as he growled at her.

He watched her carefully, he was ready to snap her neck given the chance. She lightly touched the hand that was holding her, he brought her close, so close they were mere inches apart. He narrowed his eyes and ground his teeth, trying to keep himself  
/from speaking. He watched as she took him in. He then placed a hand on her chest, drawing the corrupted part of her soul out. He could feel it trying to linger, trying to stay within, but with a quick motion of his hand, it was gone. He held her there  
/though, his hand tightening and loosening as if unsure what to do next. His dark form and blue eyes staring at her. He watched as she closed her eyes, her hand never leaving his.

"Open them Zathiria." His voice was demanding but he wanted her to see what came next.


	3. Chapter 3

Translations will be at the bottom of this chapter. I got them off of Wikia, nothing's perfect but I did try my best. Enjoy!

"Open them Zathiria." She could feel him staring at her. His grip loosened just a little. She kept her eyes closed though, not wanting to face him. She heard a low growl come from him.

"Vhenan, open them." She could feel his breath on her cheek. After a couple lingering moments, she slowly opened her eyes, keeping them down she brought her face to his, careful not to look at him. She saw the smoke around them, it whipped and whirled  
around them.

"Ma Vhenan.." His voice was softer this time. Holding back her tears she looked at him. His blue eyes gleaming through the smoke. She felt herself catch her breath. He was watching her. Slowly he lowered her to the ground, releasing his grip on her neck  
but letting his hand linger. Never breaking eye contact. As hard as she tried, the tears finally came, but she looked at him, slowly she lifted her hand to his face, hesitating before placing it on his face. She saw a smile creep across his face.  
She longed for him in a way she thought wasn't possible. She knew she missed him, but this was if she finally found apart of herself again. Her breathing become uneven as she let the tears fall for the first time since she last saw him.

"Ir tel'him, ma vhenan." Her voice was but a whisper. He leaned into her hand. His eyes fluttering for a second.

"Ir abelas." He spoke softly to her, as he used to, she gave a soft smile.

"I know." She lingered a little longer before side stepping and taking a couple steps, putting space between them. She watched as the smoke was slowly starting to disappear.

"You could have told me." His shoulders slumped as he took cautious steps towards her. She looked down at her hands letting the tears continue to fall.

"I would've helped. Instead you closed yourself away." She looked up at him, frustration finally rising in her. Her voice raised. "You threw me away like I was nothing! You didn't even stay to see what would happen when you took the anchor!" He stopped  
within arms reach of her, the smoke had all but dissipated, but his wolf features remained.

"I did not-" She snapped, letting anger, sadness, fear, everything she held in or pushed away come out. She was screaming at him now.

"No you didn't! You didn't think Solas!" She felt herself shaking. "I understood why. Why you wish to bring back your people, but that didn't mean you had to leave me behind! You took what you needed from the beginning and casted me aside without thought,  
not thinking twice to look upon me!"

"I did not want it this way!" He growled at her. "You drank from the well when I told you not to. You did not head my words. So how could I allow it? I took the anchor back because it would have killed you, I was doing you a service." She started to laugh,  
causing him to glare at her.

"I drank from the well because I did not trust those around me to tell the secrets given. I knew what was in my heart, and I followed it. My choices were my own." She was now glaring back at him. "I did not ask for the power, I did not want it. Not until  
you showed me the power I could use to heal and help."

"You could not have known that was a choice, it could have felt like one." He was now snapping at her, the black smoke slowly returning. He had no right to be this angry with her, causing her own rage to boil. "You could have made decisions that were  
not your own!"

"Don't you get it! I chose you before the well. Before Skyhold!" She seethed as she watched emotions play across his face. "I chose you after everything you told me and everything I learned. Instead of seeing that, you took what power you could, not thinking  
of the consequences!" She broke her gaze away, staring at her wrists, she saw the fresh bruises that were now forming, she winced as the pain crept its way in. She looked up at him. "They fixed the dungeons in Skyhold."

He just stood there, his hands now balled into fists.

"They kept me in the furthest parts. No windows, no light. Just a door. They kept the chains on me the entire time. For almost a year they tried everything. They casted spells, enchantments, Lyrium. They brought out equipment. They tormented me. I wanted  
to call to you, but I knew you wouldn't hear my plea." Her voiced hitch, the tears were falling faster, she let herself fall to her knees. "I had no hope. The only thing I had was the thing inside me. I truly thought I was alone in the world. I let  
the anger and darkness consume me because it was the only friend I had." She lifted her head and looked at him with blurry eyes. "You broke me Vhenan…" the words left as a whisper. She sat there, silently sobbing, not looking at him. When he finally  
spoke she flinched, his voice was deeper than expected.

"I never wished for this. I never asked to wake and find myself weak, giving the power to destroy the very thing I wanted to save. I did not ask for a war to be held and people in fear." She could hear him slowly approaching her, but she never lifted  
her head. "Least of all, I did not ask for you." She could now see the smoke, he was kneeling in front of her. He reached out hesitantly, lifting her chin, she stared into his blue eyes. His wolf form was very much present, she could hear him trying  
to hold back the anger. "I did not ask for a Dalish elf who wore her slave marks proudly. That she would welcome the knowledge of those before her. That she believed the Dread Wolf was not fearsome as the legends, but misunderstood. That she would  
stand defiantly against an all powerful mage, let alone have me by her side." He let out a low growl. "I did not ask for you, and yet, despite everything, you were there. Despite the knowledge I gave you. Despite you realizing of who I truly am. You  
always came back to me. Why?" The last word came out as a demand.

"Ar lath ma vhenan…." She felt him flinch, his brows furrowed. She knew then she always would. He did all this thinking he was protecting her. That he was doing right from the wrong doings he had done in the past. He was trying to correct everything while  
punishing himself in the process. He truly thought he wasn't hurting those around him. He was terrible at planning. This made her give a soft laugh, that started to build, causing him to lean back, taking his hand away, he glared at her, the smoke  
around him coming back to life, but she just laughed more.

Finally standing he paced, his finger and thumb pinching the bridge of his nose. She watched him, and she kept laughing. His tail kept whipping back and forth. She finally managed to lift herself off the ground, causing him to give a small pause to his  
pacing, watching his ears and tails twitch in the process. She tried to stifle a laugh, only earning another snarl from him.

"You say you did not ask for this, but didn't you?" She waved her arms about, gesturing to the area around her earning a puzzled look from him, cocking his head to the side.

"I did not." His voice was firm. But she just smiled, she was tired, tired of all this. The lies, the anger, the fighting.

"You did. You did when you sealed the gods away. When you left your people. When you allowed Corypheus to use the orb. You allowed all this." She closed her eyes and sighed. "You chose the time to wake, enough time for people to be in the right places.  
You chose to stand by my side, to allow yourself to feel something other than being alone." she let the anger seep out of her, calming herself, she was still shaking but her muscles were just tired. Opening her eyes, she gave him a soft look, he had  
stopped pacing and was facing her. "You chose the path to take my heart, and by the Dread Wolf you did. It doesn't matter what you do to me, and it should. I should hate you, despise you, everything. Yet when I look at you, I can't. I'm tired Solas.  
I'm tired of waiting. Ar dirthara. Garas arla, var arla. Ar lath ma vhenan."

She watched as he stood there. The smoke was disappearing again. With every step he took to her his wolf form began to fade. Standing in front of her the only thing that remained were his blue eyes that seemed to glow. He closed his eyes, sighing before  
opening them again, showing his grey eyes. It was then her body gave out. He caught her, pulling her lifting her into his arms. Exhaustion pulled over her. Her head was resting against his chest, she could hear his heartbeat pounding.

"Dorian!" She watched as Dorian and Varric came through the eluvian, Varric raising his bow ready to take a shot. "She's exhausted. The corrupted is gone from her. Take her back and let her rest." He walked over to them. She grabbed a hold of his shirt,  
fear lacing her tired body. He brought her in close, kissing her forehead. "I will be there when you wake, emma sa'lath." Hesitantly he handed her over to Dorian, she was still reaching for him when sleep over came her.

-x-

 _She woke to feel shackles on her hands. Fear set over her as she looked around. She was back in the dungeon. The chains rattled as she stood, reaching for the door. Her arms screaming in protest. Falling to her knees she stared at the door. She would never be free of this. She began tugging and pulling at the chains, screaming for someone, anyone to come to her. There was laughter ringing in her ears. A shadow emerged from the shadows, a sly grin showing pointed teeth, glowing red eyes. It loomed above her, she screamed louder, pulling at the chains, causing her hands to bleed from the force of her pulling against everything. Every step it took to her the darkness consumed more of the room. It was now reaching for her._

She awoke with a jolt, covered in sweat, her muscles moaning in protest for her to move. She was staring at the ceiling. She could feel the sun on her cheek. Slowly she began to sit up, her arms shaking as she did so. Looking around, she realized she  
was in her old room. It was as if nothing was touched or moved in the entire time she wasn't there. Books and parchments still stacked on her desk, armor off in the corner. Chairs and tables still unmoved from the last she used them. She looked at  
the balcony, smiling as she saw the rays of light. She slowly brought her legs around so they were flat on the floor, with much protest from her body, she tried standing. She managed to take a couple steps before her legs gave out, before she hit  
the floor, arms were around her. Looking up she saw Dorian's face smiling down.

"You should rest." He began to sit her back on the bed, but she pushed with what little strength she had.

"Please. It's been so long since I could enjoy it." She looked out at the balcony, watching as the small clouds danced across the sky, almost calling to her. He gave a weary look before wrapping her arm around his shoulders and slowly walking her to the  
balcony. She braced herself against the balcony, breathing in the fresh air. The sun felt so warm against her skin. It had been to long.

"I heard you screaming, did something happen?" Dorian was staring at her, worry across his face.

"Nightmare. Something I fear won't disappear for a long while." She gave a weak smile. He brought her into a hug, which she welcomed. They stood like that, in silence watching the sun slowly disappear behind the mountains. She then started to shiver earning  
a small chuckle from Dorian.

"Time to go in?" She squeezed him in protest. It was cold, but she wanted to stay out as long as she could. She felt the laugh through his chest. "At least let me get you something to wrap you in." Reluctently she let him go, holding onto the rail again.  
It was then she looked at her wrists. The bruises were now more prominent. She began to tremble, hearing the footsteps behind her, she gripped the railing harder trying to hide it. She felt the fur blanket drape around her shoulders.

"I assumed this would be warmer than a simple coat." She spun herself to face him, but by letting go of the railing, she now had no support to hold her, but of course he caught her. She gripped his shirt, as though letting go he would disappear.

"Solas…" Her voice was barely a whisper but he smiled at her. Her legs were now shaking, making her knees give out. With a swift motion he lifted her. Slowly walking back into the room. He chuckled as he watched her pout.

"The sun will be there tomorrow." He gently placed her on the bed, kneeling in front of her. His hand lingered on her thigh before he shook his head and stood. She reached out to him, grabbing onto the small part of his shirt like a child. He gently took  
her hand, giving a light kiss to her palm. "I'm just closing the curtains." With a light squeeze he released her hand, but her eyes never left him.

She watched as he swiftly moved around the room closing the curtains and suddenly they were plunged into dark. She let out a small gasp, holding her wrists as a small set of fear began to wash over her. Then the room was filled with light, all at once  
the candles were lit around them. Her eyes were wide and she found Solas's eyes. Realizing the sudden fear he rushed to her, lightly gripping her face.

"What's wrong?" She tried to speak, but she couldn't find the words, wincing she looked down to see her wrists were now bleeding.

She was now blinking away tears. So much fear resided in her. She felt the bed shift as he sat down beside her, he lightly took her hands. He brushed his finger tips over the bruises and scabs, a low light came from his hand, slowly they disappeared,  
as did the pain. When he was done, he brought them to his lips, causing her to catch her breath earning a smile from him.

"Ar dirthara." She watched him, after all this time, what had changed? What made him come back? She deserved answers, espcially after everything. He kept her hand in his, playing with her fingers, aware that she was staring at his face. Giving a sigh,  
she took her hand back, only for him to grasp onto it again. His voice was soft and low.

*"Melava inan enansal, ir su araval tu elvaral, u na emma abelas, in elgar sa vir mana, in tu sethenaran din emma na, lath sulevin, lath araval ena, arla ven tu vir magvir, melana 'nehn, enasal ir sa lethalin." He gazed up at her, his brows furrowed.  
"Na mir vhenas la vir."

"Why now Solas? After all this time, why come back now?" Tears stung her eyes as she fought to hold them back. Searching his face for something. "I don't want lies, or half truths." He brought her hand to his lips. He lingered there for a moment before  
lowering her hand again.

"When you never showed in the fade, I had just assumed you were done with it all. I searched for you there, waiting, though I always doubted you would come." He brought his other hand up, rubbing his face but keeping his other hand on hers. "When Cole  
found me in the fade I had assumed he was there to spy on me. It was when I saw his face I knew something was deeply wrong. He never told me what was happening, just that something had happened and he feared it would get worse." He brought his hand  
away from his face, his eyes looked over her face. "I didn't think about it, I just found myself telling him what we could do. I wasn't even sure of the outcome, but I wanted to see you, had to see you. When I saw that, that…" Anger flared in him,  
his eyes began to turn blue again. She placed her free hand on his cheek, he leaned into it closing his eyes, calming himself. "When I saw you fall apart, it broke me harder than I ever thought possible. The anger I saw in your eyes, the sadness and  
fear. I wanted to take it all away, but I knew I was the one that caused it, so how could I ask for forgiveness when I deserved none?"

"I thought I hated you." She spoke softly, though he still flinched at the words, she lifted her other hand bringing it to the other side of his face, making him look only at her. "It would have been so much easier to believe I did hate you. I had so  
many days to think of ways to hurt you. To make you feel what I felt in that time. I also knew that wasn't right, that deep down, that wasn't my true thought or feeling for you. When I was free, I was free to be angry on my own, to be sad, and filled  
with fear. I was also filled with joy, and love. Things I believed I would never feel again. Yes you caused the terrible pain, but you also took it away. It doesn't matter what form you take, what name you bare, I would still follow you because through  
all that pain, the love is that much more. Ar lath Fen'Harel la Solas." She smiled at him. She knew that even if he were to leave tomorrow, her heart would follow. She was forever his, and she wouldn't change that. The pain was nothing compared to  
the love they shared.

She watched as he sat there, staring at her. She withdrew her hands and placed them on her lap, watching him a little longer she turned and looked towards the curtain. The last few rays of sun were clinging to the balcony. A strong gust of wind moved  
through the room, flapping the curtains about and putting out most of the candles. Her hair whipped across her face, finally settling, half of it covering her face. The room was now dimly lit, scattered candles around the room trying to stay lit.

His soft hand was lightly brushing away the hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear. She let out a soft sigh, not knowing what to expect from him. His fingers lingered on her neck causing her to shudder. That earned a small chuckle from him. His  
voice soft, almost a whisper.

"Are you cold ma vhenan?" He let his fingers slowly trace down her neck to her shoulders, causing another shudder. She shook her head, not sure if she should look at him. She suddenly felt his lips brush her ear making her tremble in the slightest. "Na  
vhenan'ara, emma sa'lath." She whipped her head around, her breath hitching in her throat.

Ma vhenan - my heart

Ir tel'him - I'm/I am me again

Ir abelas - I'm/I am sorry

Ar lath - I love you

Ar dirthara - I learn/seek truth

Garas arla - Come home

Var arla - our home

Emma sa'lath - my one love

Na mir chenas la vir - Your my home and path (loosely)

Na chenan'ara, emma sa'lath - your my hearts desire, my one love.

*Time was once a blessing but long journeys are made longer when alone within. Take spirit from the long ago but do not dwell in lands no longer yours. Be certain in need, and the path will emerge to a home tomorrow and time will again be the joy it once  
was. - It is an elven song that I found on Wikia.


	4. Chapter 4

She stopped to catch her breath, sweat rolling down her face. Closing her eyes she took deep breaths. Her muscles ached, but it just meant it was working, opening them she looked at him to start again. The young soldier sprinted at her, charging with  
a dull sword. With her one dagger she pushed the sword away while spinning, hooking one arm around his throat, kicking out his leg and pinning him to the ground, the other hand holding another dagger to his throat. Satisfied she helped the young man  
up. They were about to go again when Dorian stepped in.

"As much as I love you regaining your strength, you should take a break now and again."

"If I take a break, I might lose strength." She gave him a curt smile, before beckoning the soldier to begin again. Hesitantly he obeyed, lunging at her again.

"I was more talking to the soldiers you see keen on beating down." He stood off to the side, leaning against his staff watching.

"Well, maybe they will learn a thing or two and won't be so easy to beat." Shekicked the sword out of the soldiers hand, grabbing his left arm twisting it behind his back. Kicking out his knees, holding her dagger againto his throat. After  
a couple seconds she released him, helping him up again. When he stood he held up his hands, suggesting he had enough, agitated she let him go, turning to Dorian. "Happy?"

"Not in the slightest." Her voice came out harsh, almost like a growl. He held up his hands.

"It is not me you're angry at love, remember that." She rolled her eyes, making her way back up to the castle.

"No, but you seem keen on agitating me." She emphasized the word keen, earning a small roll of his eyes.

"True." He took a couple long strides so he was now walking beside her. "I only do this, so when he does return, if he returns, you will punch him in that pretty little elf face before he says a word."

"And if I don't?" He smiled.

"Then I will, then Bull, Cassandra, Cullen, Se-."

"Alright, I get it." She shook her head, a small smile. "How is it you can annoy and make me happy?" He put a finger to his lips and smiled bigger.

"Ah, that my dear, is a secret."

With that he left, greeting Bull and Varric. She started to head to her quarters when she saw the study door was slightly opened. Curious she then turned and headed into the room, cautiously opening the door. The room was dimlylit, but no one seemed  
to be in the room. She ventured further in, hesitating after a couple steps and then left the room. She couldn't bring herself to look around. She had made sure they kept the room clean, but made sure nothing was disturbed or moved out of place. Though  
as much as she tried, she couldn't go in. It had been seven months since she saw Solas. The last thing he told her was that he had something he must do, but he would be back. That was it. There were no letters, no visits in the fade. Nothing, he just  
vanished again. Anger now started to fill her. Shutting the door she made her way to her quarters, ignoring anyone who wanted her attention. The only one she seemed comfortable talking to was Dorian. They all knew what happened, she just couldn't  
stand talking about it over and over with them, some how Dorian knew when it was ok to ask, and when to vere the conversation. Upon entering the room, she collapsed on the couch. A quick flick of her wrist and the fireplace lit up. No one could explain  
how she suddenly had the ability to use magic, but it was kept amongst themselves, no one outside the Inquisition knew, and she was sure to only use it in private. She watched the flames dance and flicker. Anger flared again, causing her to stand  
and pace. She was infuriated, how could he? After everything, he left without saying a word, again. Her fingers began to tingle with electricity. She walked up to the far wall and punched as hard as she could, electricity flowing in leaving a darkened  
mark on the wall. As much as she loved that damn wolf, she was also very pissed. She flung away from the wall, storming to the balcony. The cool air hit her face, closing her eyes she took a deep breath and let the anger subside. Opening her eyes  
she smiled, when he does show his face, she will show him anger.

-x-

She awoke with a loud banging echoing in the room. Peeking one eye opened it was morning, realizing it was the door, she sighed and pulled herself out of the bed. Looking down she had slept in her armor, rolling her eyes at herself she went to the door.  
Unlocking it to see a worried Leliana.

"There is urgent news, please, come with me." Leliana grabbed her hand, yanking her along, leading her to the war room. The people in the hall were buzzing with talk, though most of their faces were worried. Before she could ask, Leliana pushed her into  
the war room where familiar faces faced her. They were all gathered in the room, staring at her.

"W-what?" Leliana gave her a shove to the table.

"This is big. Not as big as Corypheus, but big." Josephine spoke, scribbling on a piece of paper, her brows furrowed.

She walked over to the table, nothing seemed out of ordinary, she looked up in confusion.

"I don't understand, what is so urgent that I didn't have time to at least do my hair." She began to braid it, causing it to fall over her right shoulder.

"Elves." She stared at Cullen.

"What do you mean elves? You told me they all but disappeared." Her eyes narrowed watching him, he shifted uncomfortably under her gaze.

"At the time, they were. But now." Josephine handed him a piece of paper. "We have heard reports. We sent out more than one scout to confirm it." He now handed her the paper.

Spymaster,

We don't know why, or how they appeared, but there is a massive band of elves, easily enough to be an army. They do not seemed armed in any way, dressed in casual clothing. There are women and children in the midst.

There seems to be a leader of sorts marching them on. He has fur drapped around his shoulder, head shaved on both sides with long black hair down the center. There seems to be some sort of small skull on the top of his forehead.

It seems the force marches towards Skyhold, the path they take only makes sense. We will watch them for as long as we can.

Scout Harding

She read the letter at least three times, going over each word. Why would they march to Skyhold? If they were unarmed were they no longer a threat? Or was that the idea. Who was this man leading them? It was Dorian who spoke next.

"We believe it to be him. Though, the description is, well, not him. It would make sense no?" She looked up at them, anger starting to rise, but she maintained it as best as she could.

"What do you mean." Her voice came out harsh. Dorian just gave her a soft look, but he looked at Bull.

"We travelled to the ruins no? It took us weeks to travel there and a couple days to search the area. Imagine entire tribes. They would have to stop and rest far more often then four of us would. Plus we had horses. They have children who need rest as  
well as the mothers." She breathed in slowly, letting her senses come to her.

"If, IF, it is him, it still wouldn't take this long to travel, couple months maybe."

"Yes, but imagine telling a large group of people to leave another home. It would take time to convince each one again to follow him, plus you would have to watch over the people going through the mirror." Bull pointed to the map, causing them all to  
look down. "You would also have to steer clear, mostly, of peering eyes, but close enough to water. They would most likely follow the sea, maintaining a safe distance not to be seen by Val Royeaux. You also wouldn't risk getting to close to the plains  
or Lion. They would follow the sea until they reached the base of the mountains, making their way through the center, covering them from both sides." She looked up at Bull with a questioning look. "I, uh, may have researched." He gave a nervous laugh  
before stepping back.

"Our problem is, we don't know if this is a friendly force, or…" Leliana casted her gaze to the map, biting her lip.

"Or a new war." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "If it is a trap, I have to stay here and protect what people I can. Send Dorian, Cassandra, Bull and Vivienne. Hopefully friendly faces won't enforce an attack. Plus, Dorian has an amulet which we can  
contact through giving us an immediate report." She looked up, they were all staring at her. It was odd, but then again, this was the first time she was giving orders in 2 years. "Sorry.."

"No, no, that's actually a nice plan. I just have a question though." Cullen looked down at her, raising an eyebrow. "Why send two mages, wouldn't it be wiser to keep one behind?"

"No, if we send to they can cast barriers giving us a little more time. Their magic is strong, and stronger together." She gave a small smile, trying to be reassuring, but she didn't fully believe it would work.

"We will be ready to leave in 2 hours. I'll send word as soon as we can. How far out are they now?" Dorian looked to Leliana.

"It will be 2 weeks, more or less depending how fast they travel. I can send some of my scouts to meet you there and give you aid if needed." They all started to file out, leaving her and Varric in the room. She picked up the letter again, not really  
reading it this time.

"What will you do?" She blinked up at him, stopping the tears from falling.

"I…. I don't know…" She placed the letter down, her finger trailing on the map of the route they would take. "If.. If it is a war, I fear the worst, I fear I will have to do something I never thought I would." She looked up meeting his gaze. "If it's  
not? Would I really turn down these people? My kin? Women and children? I wouldn't think of turning down any others, but I fear most would not share my ideals." She huffed in frustration.

"In either case, you know you have people that will stand by your decisions. We have this far. And do you know why?" He placed a hand on her arm. "It's because we believe no matter how hard the choice, it's for the greater good, not for your personal  
gain." She smiled at him. "Now, that doesn't mean you still shouldn't punch him, how did Dorian put it… ah yes! That pretty little elf face." She then laughed, wiping away the one stray tear.

"I will, Creators know I am angry with him." He gave her a soft squeeze of the arm, before disappearing.

She walked over to one of the large windows, peering down the mountain side. It was a beautiful day, surely. One last glance she walked out of the war room. Anger still lingered but there was something else deep down, something she didn't expect to feel.  
Curling her hands into fists she smiled as she walked down the hallway. Excitement.

I know it's a short chapter, but the next one will be longer, it might be the last chapter or second last, I'm not sure yet. Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

I again apologize for any typo's but I hope you enjoy!

Translations are at the bottom :)

It took awhile for the castle to be almost silent. Most were to busy getting things prepared for the on coming elves/ Not knowing if they were asking for sanctuary or were ready to kick down the door. No one had heard from Dorian or the others. It had been 7 days since they rode out. She played with the amulet, wanting to call upon him but afraid they may be in hiding. After a couple moments she dropped the amulet, letting it hit her chest. Tilting her head she listened. There were a few feet pattering about the halls, no doubt maids. Satisfied they were not going to disturb her this late, she set up her barriers around the room. None thought this odd, especially with the potential army knocking at their door. She climbed the ladder that lead above her bed to a small platform. A quick wave of her hand caused the stone to move, stepping in, she gave another wave closing it behind her. The torches began to light there was down a very small corridor. It opened to a small room. The ceiling was quite low, should could reach her arm above her and her fingers could lightly brush the stone. The room was very plain, though she hadn't thought to add anything in it, it only served one purpose at the moment.

She approached the pedestal which now began to come to life. The barriers and wards were powerful, it made sure that no trace of the room existed, or the power that was held within the walls. She reached out and touched the now fully vibrant orb, it's green spark reaching out to her. After the defeat of Corypheus and Solas disappeared she collected the pieces of the orb before Cassandra came up the steps. It took four months to piece it back together and last to months to try and tap into the power. The power of the orb was faint at first, but she put the last fractured piece together all the cracks faded and the faintest green was at the core. Every time they tapped into it, the power grew. She wasn't exactly sure how it worked, and neither did Cole but he was positive there was a way to take the power, though the outcome could be devastating. She made sure none of the others knew about it, keeping the wards and barriers up all the time was constantly draining her mana. Cole had told her that since her sudden gift in magic came, she was growing each day in strength and believed that is why the orb gained power, even after Solas took the anchor, some part of her was connected to it and the way it flared to life when she was near, only made him believe that she could some how contain it.

"We don't have much time." Cole appeared beside her, arms folded in front of him, though his hat was missing.

"I know, but we are almost done." She took her hand back, placing both behind her and fully turning to him. He gave her a concerned look, brows furrowing together. "Cole?"

"This could kill you. The power, it is strong. Could corrupt." He stared at the orb a little longer before shaking his head, worried eyes looking at her.

"Cole. I only wish to hold the power, for the chance to stop him if I must. I don't want another war. I don't want races erased for one to thrive."

"What if he asks for it back?"

"He will not get it, not willingly." She rolled her shoulders back, trying to show the confidence she thought she needed.

"I only hope." Sighing, he walked to the other side of the pedestal. He placed a hand on the orb and reached out with the other towards her. "We must try again." His smile was weak and tired.

"We keep trying. I promise Cole, I won't let the spirits suffer, I promise." She placed her hand on the opposite side of the orb and took his hand. His eyes changed into a glowing soft yellow, he tilted his head to the left, and she gave him a nod. Her head flung back at the surge of power that coursed through, she was now surrounded by darkness. Cole was no where to be seen. The ground trembled beneath her, she stood still, desperately trying to find what was causing the tremors when the suddenly stopped, and a breath prickled the back of her neck. Slowly she turned, her fear now seemed to wrap around her spine and she stood still, staring back into six glowing red eyes.

 _Ma emma harel, da'len. Ahnsul ma garas._

She stood. Frozen and unable to speak. She heard the creature snarl, causing everything to tremble again.

 _Dirtha da'len._

She dropped to her knee's bowing her head.

"Ir abelas, Fen'Harel. Ar esaya mar halani." She heard him, what she assumed, laugh, causing shivers through her.

 _Ahnsul ar halani a esha'lin._

"Ar ladanem mar foci, ma sul'ema." His voice rang loud, sinking her further to the ground.

 _Thu gya ma. Ar bellanaris din'an heem. Ma eolasa banal ma dirtha._

She don't know what made her snap, why should would even think to yell at the mighty Fen'Harel, her fear was still ever present but her anger was much more. She stood standing and began shouting at the god before her.

"No! You know nothing of which I speak! Have you thought why your power wavers? Why it is I and not yourself to be here?"

She watched as the darkness began to fade, the ground beneath her was blackened grass and the light around them was green smoke that swirled around her. She watched as Fen'Harel became more visible. The massive black wolf towered over her, easily the height of a giant. He was sitting, his tail curled around his feet, ears pointed towards her, the eyes focused.

 _Then tell me, child, why are you here and not me._ His head tilted slightly.

"A man named Corypheus came in possession of your orb. I bore the mark of the anchor which allowed me to defeat him. When he was defeated, the orb shattered. Yo-Solas left just after, without taking the pieces. I felt they held some greater importance." She watched him, but he only stared at her, watching. "I had finally pieced the orb together, though I did not expect there to be power still left. A spirit then aided me into tapping into the orb."

 _Yes, the spirit who names himself Cole._

"How do yo-"

 _I can see his aura around you, though I can also sense you are marked by my power. No one but I have come into the orb as you have. So I am curious da'len, I sense the fear within you. Yet you do not run, why._ His head tilted ever so slightly, carefully watching her.

"Ar laiem lath I Fen'Harel." She watched him, he slowly looked up at the sky, he was truly a magnificent beast. It felt like years in the silence, just waiting, he then brought his gaze upon her again, though this time she did not feel fear from him.

 _Why do you seek this power, why should I grant you this._

"I will not lie, I am angry with you, well, the other you. You've torn me, broken me, and yet I wish to save you."

 _I see sadness as well as the anger within you. Why though, the sadness._

"I am sad because you do not trust me to help. You believe that in order to redeem yourself you must walk alone, raise Arlathan while killing any one who stands in your way. I wish to save you from that, to find a better way. I want to stand by your side so you never have to fear being alone again. I wish to give you freedom. Ma ema ma vhenan, Fen'Harel." He stood wand slowly walked to her, bowing his head so it was now level with hers. Without realizing she was reaching out to him, his eyes closed, nudging into the palm of her hands. She brought her forehead to his snout, sighing into him. "Sathan lasa em ghi'la ma." Tears formed in her eyes. Every fiber in her screamed to run, but her heart told her to stay.

 _Ma nuvenin._

She was lurched forward, causing the air to leave her lungs making her gasp. Snapping her eyes open she was on her knees still grasping the orb and Cole's hand, though his eyes were normal again. Her entire body seemed to hum with power. The orb was now black, as though it was just a regular stone sphere. Slowly she stood, Cole came around, reaching out a hand helping her up.

"You accepted him, as he you." Cole had a massive grin across his face. Though she looked at him confused.

"What do you mean?"

"You accepted him, in his true form. If he had not excepted you, you would not have lived, or gained the power."

"But how would he know? This part of him wasn't connected."

"True. Yet, something tells me, he will know." He gave her a bow and disappeared.

She picked up the orb, and walked back down the corridor. Waving her hand, causing the wall to move once more, she put out the torches and closed it behind her, making her way back down. Placing the orb on her desk she removed the barriers, only then she heard the shouting coming from her amulet.

"Inquisitor! Zathiria!" Dorian's voice rang through the room. She placed the amulet in front of her lips.

"By the makers Dorian, do you have to shout?"

"Yes! I have been calling you for almost 2 hours!" She rolled her eyes.

"What is it Dorian?"

"You are not off the hook so easily! Just wait until I'm back!" She heard lowered voices, then suddenly a new voice came through, one that she knew too well.

"Vhenan." She stared down at the amulet, a flicker of rage passed through her.

"Tel din athlan em mah sule ma itha em." She hissed the words to him.

"Ir abelas, Inquisitor."

"What it is?" The was a long pause, she had no patience for his games right now. "Dirtha Fen'Harel."

"Ma nuvenin. The people I bring mean no harm. I only ask you give them shelter for a couple of days. There is much we need to discuss." She could hear the anger through his voice.

"So you wish to tell me that you want Skyhold back?"

"As I said, there is much to be discussed." Suddenly Dorian's voice came back.

"I don't know what you said love, but he is furious." The amusement practically oozed from his voice causing her to chuckle.

"I don't doubt it. How far out are you?"

"We assume a two days walk, though we are sending Cassandra and Solas back with two horses. Bull and I will stay back and use the remaining horse to help. They should be there by sundown."

"Why is he coming now? Why leave the people?"

"He only told us there was something important he must discuss with you."

"Always cryptic….. I will tell the others and start the right preparations. I will await your safe return."

"Goodbye love."

-x-

She sat on the throne rubbing her temples, thankful she had changed out of her armor. Before there was a gathering in the hall, she managed to sneak back to her quarters. She had chosen a long black dress that had slits reaching her thighs. The sleeves hung off her shoulders, the inseam split at her elbow, and draped at the back of her arm just below her wrist. The dark brown leather corset with gold trim and red ribbon held the fabric in place, it had a deep v, showing just enough of her chest and hugged her hips. She didn't bother with shoes as there were rugs everywhere in the hall and at the base of the thrown. She threw her hair in a lose braid that draped over her left shoulder and ended just above her belly button. She admitted it was a very revealing outfit, but it was much more comfortable than the heavy armor she had on, and makers know she was tired of wearing the Inquisition outfit. She leaned on her right hand, crossing her legs letting the fabric fall to the sides of her legs.

The throne itself was much comfier than she thought. They had chosen a Ferelden design, Josephine had told her the crafters had named it Legacy. There were two curved stone walls on each side that rose above her head that connected to an owls head that looked as though it was watching over the hall. At the base of each wall was a fire pit that kept her warm during long gatherings and on either side of her there were arm rest that slightly curled to her. There were furs and blankets that were draped over the seat. The throne was beautiful, though at night it did make her seem ominous.

She watched as the last few people cleared the hall. The gathering was to tell most of the merchants and any villagers that there would be elves taking sanctuary. At first the people yelled and screamed, claiming that this is what they would want, to see us weak and venerable, to overthrow the inquisition. After a few hours of watching Leliana and Josephine trying to settle the arguments, she had finally spoke, causing everyone to stop.

"Do you wish to turn away women? Children?" They all cheered saying it if it was to stop a war they would. She lifted her hand, silencing them again. "There is a threat of war, yes. I ask you this. What if it was your family? Your daughter, son, wife or husband. Sisters and brothers. Would you not want sanctuary for them? Would you not want them safe in one of the strongest places in Thedas?" She watched the faces turn from anger to that of sadness and understanding. "I am not asking you to treat them as your own, I ask that you aid them. They do not have a home of their own so I ask you open your arms and help in any way you can."

After awhile the merchants started to agree what they would sell, and what they would give. A few villagers even offered their houses to share. After hours of talk, debate and arguing they finally resolved most of the issues, reassuring them that the guards would still be on alert for every ones sake.

She closed her eyes, taking in a deep breath. The sun had just set, and she could feel the warmth of the fires beside her. Her thoughts wandered back to the orb. The power gained from it intensified her own magic. She knew the other mages and apostates could feel the power change, but she said nothing. Her thoughts were interrupted when the large entrance door opened. She kept her eyes narrow and kept her head rested on her hand, watching as the two figures came into view with the torches that lit the large room. Her face remained unchanged as she saw Cassandra and Solas come into view. Cassandra still wore her Inquisition armor, though it was now battered and faded. She looked at Solas, the clothing he wore was similar to what he wore before, though now he was in a white robe that was open at the chest, revealing the jaw bone. White fur was draped over his right should that tucked into a leather belt at his waist which surprisingly had no weapons holstered. He had black pants that were tucked into boots that reached the middle of his leg. She looked at his face, it seemed unchanged though he now had hair. It was long and black, pinned together at the back and both sides of his head shaved, small skull was on his forehead where his hairline was. She watched his face, a small smile was played on his lips, though she did not return it. She waited until they were half way before she stood, watching his reaction as the dress pooled at her feet, dragging behind her as she took silent steps, the fabric moved between her thighs, revealing her legs as she walked. His eyebrow rose, he watched her as she walked to him. She closed the distance in a matter of seconds, balling her right fist and connecting it to his jaw. She gave a quick look at his reaction, he was shocked but managed to conceal it well, satisfied she turned and made her way to the study. Calling out to Cassandra before disappearing into the room, not checking to see if he followed.

"We will talk when I am done, inform Leliana you have arrived."

She walked into the study, her heart skipping a beat, it was the first time she willed herself to fully walk into the room. Her body tensed for a moment before she shook it off, she flicked her wrist causing the torches to come to life around the room. She sat against the desk, arms placed at her sides, gripping the edge. It was now she cursed herself for wearing a revealing dress. Seconds later he came through the door, closing it behind him before standing across from her, keeping his distance. She cocked her head to the side, letting stray hairs fall.

"Dirtha." Her voice was demanding and laced with anger, she wanted to hit him again, but she remained planted where she was. She felt the magic in her hum. He looked her over once more, curious then shaking his head, wiping all emotion.

"You know what I wish to ask. I wish for the people to come here, to home."

"A home you wish to rule? Would you kick the people who live here now out?" His stance changed, clearly agitated, he placed his hands behind his back.

"If there would be a problem to arise, then yes." She narrowed her eyes, glaring at him.

"You forget, this is not your domain. It is mine."

"A domain I led you to." He snapped at her, a low growl came from him.

"One you gave to me." He took a step towards, standing within arms reach of her.

"One I will take back if I must."

She flicked her wrist, sending him into the far wall behind him. She now stood, taking a couple steps forward before stopping, watching as he stood, anger and shock.

"You threaten the good people who live here, you threaten me Dread Wolf." She saw the disgust in his face at the name. "I would open the doors to our kin but I will not kick out those who have made a home here. This place is sanctuary, not a place you can fill your hurt pride in." Her voice was seething anger. Her fingers tingled as the electricity came to life in her hands. His eyes snapped to her hand, lingering before meeting her now confident gaze. He then sent a ball of fire at her, but she flicked her wrist causing it to disintegrate. In that moment he was standing in front of her. She lifted her hand, electricity now dancing in her hand, when he grabbed her wrist. His eyes were a darkened grey, he was towering over her.

"How?" She let a cold laugh come from her causing him to clench his jaw.

"You don't recognize your own power?" He stilled, giving her the chance to shove him with a little force with her left hand. Making him take a couple steps back and releasing her wrist. She watched a ray of emotions go over his face. "You can sleep here, I'll send one of the maids to offer you assistance. We're done for now." She turned on her heal and walked to the door, but before she could reach it he was standing in front of her blocking the exit. He leaned against the door, crossing his arms.

"We are not done, da'len." She went to hit him again, but he just moved his head slightly causing her to hit the door behind him. She glared at him, before stepping back and placing a hand on her hip.

"Ara seranna-ma?"

"Ar'an ane tel'din, ma vhenan." Anger flared through her, she wiped a bolt of electricity to her right, hitting the small shelf. He raised his eyebrow in amusement.

"Thu Gya ma!"

He pushed himself off the door, keeping his arms crossed and bent down in front of her, a smile still on his face.

"We are not done." He hooked a finger under her chin, making her neck strain as he forced her to look up. His eyes flashed to her lips, then back to her eyes. "How do you have my power? I took the anchor from you." She jerked her head out of his grasp, she sent another bolt of electricity to the wall again. Curling her hands into fists, turning her back to him.

"What other choice did I have?" Her voice was quiet but it dripped in anger. "You left again, no word of what your plan was." She could feel herself shaking with anger.

"I did say I was coming back." She spun, her braid coming undone letting her hair fall around her. She placed a finger on his chest, glaring up at him, small bits of electricity danced at her finger tip.

"HOW WAS I SUPPOSE TO KNOW THAT WAS YOUR WORD! HOW WAS I SUPPOSE TO KNOW YOU WOULDN'T COME BACK WITH AN ARMY! HOW WAS I SUPPOSE TO KNOW YOU WOULD COME TO ME!" He went to speak but she sent a small wave of electricity into him as a warning she was not finished. "NO! I WILL FINISH." She took a breath, letting her voice lower. "You left me Solas. You told me things in riddles and rhymes. You never once told me the truth, I had to figure it out, and when you couldn't contain the lie anymore that's when you told me and left, again! You let your own pain and pride cloud your judgement while you condemn those around you, for what? For redemption? There is no redemption for slaughtering countless races, just to restore your own!" She took her hand back, walking to the desk and whipping a book across the room. "I took the orb in hopes it would give me answers. It took me months to piece it back together and months to tap into the remaining power. It was the piece of you that you lost when the orb shattered, it gave itself to me, it believed when I wished to save you!" She walked away from the desk, and headed for the couch on the opposite side of the room. She stretched one leg and brought the other knee up, resting a hand on it. The sides of the dress fell to the floor as the center place rested between her legs. She watched him through her glare, he dropped his gaze, the tips of his ears going red. Her mouth twitched in approval. She closed her eyes and continued. "You left me Solas. Leaving me to believe any possibility would happen. I want our kin restored, but not at the expense of others. Can't this be enough for now? Can't we teach them the ways of old and go from there? Ar nuven halani. Creators eolasa Fen'Harel ir'verem…"

A tears escaped, but she let them fall, she could hear him moving, suddenly her eyes snapped open when his thumb brushed a tear out of the way. He was no longer smiling, his brows were furrowed together and he looked at her, pain laced his features.

"Ar nuven ma revas o min nu. Ar nuven ma sul'ema mar self la'var ar ema. Ma ane tel'din u la'var ma sil."

"Ar tel'nuvena lin, ar nuvena atish."

"Lasa em halani ma." She gave him a soft smile, the anger was gone, this man made her so furious yet she could let it disappear in an instant. He stared at her, brushing back some of her hair. He met her gaze again, then stood taking a step back, he let his head hang, his hands now resting at his sides. When he spoke it was barley a whisper.

"Ahnsul ma sul'ema em?" She stood in front of him, placing her hand on the jaw bone that rested on his chest. He brought his hand to hers as she played with the bone between her fingers.

"Elvyr. Ar lath, Fen'Harel."

Ahnsul ma garas - Why do you come  
Ar esaya mar halani - I seek your help  
Ahnsul ar halani a esha'lin - why would I help a child  
Ar ladanem mar foci ma sul'ema - I fixed your orb when you would give up  
Thu gya ma - How dare you  
Ma eolasa banal ma dirtha - You know nothing of which you speak  
Ar laiem lath I Fen'Harel - I fell in love with you Dread Wolf  
Ma ema ma vhenan - you have my heart  
Tel din athlan em mah sule ma itha em - do not call me that until you see me.  
Dirtha - speak  
Thu gya ma - How dare you  
Ar'an ane tel'din - we ar enot done  
Ara seranna ma - excuse me  
Ar nuven halani - i wish to help  
Eolasa ir'verem - Know stole my heart (Creators know Dread Wolf stole my heart )  
Ar nuven ma revas o min nu - I wish you free from this pain  
Ar nuven ma sul'ema mar self la'var ar ema - I wish you forgive yourself as I have  
Ma ane tel'din u la'var ma sil - You are not alone as you thought  
Ar tel'nuvena lin, ar nuvena atish - I do not wish for blood, i wish for peace  
Lasa em halani ma - let me help you  
Ahnsul ma sul'ema em - Why do you for give me  
Elvyr. Ar lath - Simple. I love you Dread Wolf.


	6. Chapter 6

**Translations:**  
 **Ar'd ema dalem ish'ala ga - I'd have killed them all**  
 **Ir abelas - I'm sorry**  
 **Ne'emma lath. Ma ane emma - My one love. You are mine.**  
 **Tel'pala I em - Do not play with me**  
 **Ar Tel'harel vhenan - I do not trick, my heart**  
 **Ma lath em - You love me**  
 **Pala ma - Fuck you**  
 **Ma nuvenin, ma'arlath - As you wish, my love**  
 **On era'vun - Good night.**

It had been four days since they last spoke, she avoided him as best as she could, waiting until the others showed up so she could discuss a plan to remove the veil without completely eradicating every other species. The elves, Dorian, Bull and Vivienne had arrived yesterday afternoon, she would have preferred to hold the meeting then, but seeing the shape of them all, she decided to give it a night. Sighing to herself she threw on her black tunic, it had red trim on the edges and snaked up around her neck leaving her arms and back bare, slits on either side came up just above her hips. She untangled her hair, letting it fall in curls around her shoulders. Throwing on the black cloak, she reached into the hidden pouch, taking out an earring. It was a small hoop, from it were 3 green beads that dangled and at the end was a small silver bell, it had small, intricate designs, it was in the shape of a tear drop. She put it back through the tip of her right ear, the bell sounding like the sweetest music. She smiled before putting a silent barrier around it so only but her could hear it, deciding against shoes, she made her way to the war room, her feet barley making any noise against the stone.

Peering into the war room, she saw she was the first one in. She walked over to the large map that laid on the giant table, grabbing a pen, she looked over the map. She put small x's on the spots where she closed rifts couple years ago. The bell gave a soft jingle, making her peer up through her lashes. They started walking into the room, staying silent they made their way around the table, Solas, the last to walk through. She made one more x on the map before fully looking up. Pointing at the map she spoke.

"All these are where we closed rifts across Thedas. Including the Breach in Haven." She watched as they looked over the map. "These area's didn't just open just because. They opened because the veil is slightly weaker in these parts. Mind you, they were violently opened, causing spirits to turn into demons."

"The spirits cannot adjust to sudden change like that, it is to overwhelming for them." She raised an eyebrow at Solas.

"I'm well aware, but do you recall that your plan is to destroy it completely? The spirits would spiral out of control and no peaceful one would remain."

"Ar'd ema dalem ish'ala ga….." His face dropped, his eyes widened.

"Yes. You would have done nothing. What I'm suggesting is easier."

"Open them. Carefully. Let spirits come on own. Will not turn. Take time." Cole spoke from the corner of the room, a small smile across his face. "We would be free."

"That's right Cole." She looked back at Solas. "You could bring back the elvhen, without the bloodshed."

"I'll send word out. I'll have my people ready at most of the locations." Leliana gave a small bow before leaving, Josephine following behind.

"I'll reach out to Tevinter, ask any mages to come." Dorian gave her a small smile. "Hey Bull, you think the chargers would mind helping them out?" Bull walked with him.

"I don't see it being a problem, though they will expect payment." He laughed as he nudged Dorian who gave a pout before joining his laugh.

The rest soon followed, talking amongst themselves, planning trips and managing groups. Soon it was just her and Solas in the room, but she didn't meet his eye, instead she jotted down a few notes then made her way to the door only to have him lightly grab her arm.

"Ir abelas." She jerked her arm out of his reach.

"You're sorry? We could have figured this out two fucking years ago! Instead, you run off with your tail between your legs, literally and figuratively." He scoffed at her.

"Are you really going to make jokes?" She turned and crossed her arms.

"Yes. It is better than punching you in the face is it not?" He bared his teeth slightly, small growl escaping only making her laugh. "Really? Back to the growling?"

"You assume that I am not already angry with myself!"

"You are only angry because you did not think of this plan, you did not THINK." He snapped, his voice low but the growl now fully escaped.

"There are many reasons I am angry, there is only one that pains me." His eyes darkened as he looked at her, but she held his gaze. She let herself sound sarcastic and annoyed.

"Oh please, do tell." She waved a hand at him, giving a slight curtsey. He just stood there, staring at her. After a couple minutes she sighed. "I have things to do. Talk to me or don't. You know where the study is." With that she turned, walking away from him and making her way to the tavern. It has been to long since she had a drink, she saw Varric in the hall.

"Hey Varric."

"Hey Sparky."

"Still with the nickname huh?"

"Yup."

"Tavern?" He eyed her suspiciously before nodding.

"I'll grab Dorian and Bull." She made her way out, only catching a glimpse of Solas before leaving the building. She made her way town the steps, stopping and saying hello to a few villagers. Finally walking into the Tavern, she waved at the bar keep and made her way to the far corner where they used to sit after long trips. The bar keep brought her 3 bottles along with a couple mugs. He then brought her a larger bottle, placing it in front of her.

"Mackay's. Best stuff we have, it's on the house." He gave her a soft smile before heading back around the bar. Soon Bull, Dorian, and Varric joined her. Dorian and Varric sat beside her as Bull pulled up a chair resting his feet on the bench. She poured them all a drink.

"What are we toasting to Boss?"

"How about to jackass gods?" She laughed at Dorian.

"To gods thinking they know everything." They raised their glasses downing the shot.

\- MANY hours later (Sun has set again) -

"I, I, I think. Shhhh! I think that, that, umm, what?" They all laughed at Dorian causing him to pout. "I'm, I'm c-calling it!" He stood on wobbly legs, Bull catching him as he started to fall.

"Common Mage, I'll take ya back." He waved at them as he lifted Dorian over his shoulder, making them all laugh again.

"Callin a night Sparky?" Varric's cheeks were red, but he smiled at her. She grabbed the half filled bottle of Mackay and stood.

"Nope, be-better idea." He only shook his head, taking another shot.

"See ya in the morn' then."

She gave a nod and slowly made her way back. Stumbling a few times on the steps making her giggle. She finally pushed through the big door and walked down the hall. She was making her way back to her quarters when she saw the Study door open, a small flicker of light came from the room. Thinking it over, she pushed her way through, finding Solas nose deep in another book at his desk. She watched him from the archway, taking another swig from the bottle.

"Have you come to talk?" She pushed herself away from the archway, making her way over to his desk, sitting on the edge looking down at him, her head slightly cocked to the right letting her hair fall to the side, she placed the bottle in front of him. "I don't drink." He kept his eyes in the book, she rolled her eyes and reached for the book, taking it from him she placed it on the far end of the desk. He sighed, looking up at her raising an eye brow. She picked up the bottle, taking a sip, not breaking eye contact. She licked her lips and held the bottle out for him. He shook his head, taking the bottle, he drank. "Happy?" She smiled.

"Be right back." She got up and disappeared, moments later she returned with another bottle. "Secret stash." It was a bottle of West Hill Brandy. She popped the cork, taking another sip. Looking at him to do the same. He sighed and drank with her. She moved her way to the couch, bringing her legs up to the side, her head resting on her head, fingers lacing through her hair as she watched him.

"Are you going to talk?" She stared at him a moment longer, another smile across her face. Pointing at the bottle he held.

"You have to catch up."

"I don't have to do anything." He tilted his head, but he took another sip.

"Mmmm, you say that…." They sat like that as she watched him drink. He placed the empty bottle on his desk. Slowly she stood, walking over to him. She made her way around the desk, leaning against it she stood beside him. Handing him the other bottle. When he didn't take it, she raised an eyebrow, taking a slow sip. She handed him the bottle again, licking the remaining drop that lingered on her bottom lip. He took it, watching her as he did so. When he was done, he placed the bottle on his desk, beside the other one. He gently took her arm, bringing her slowly onto his lap in the chair. She placed an elbow on his one shoulder, the other stayed on her lap. She lowered her voice, looking over his face and playing with his hair. "Tell me. Was I just a toy to play with?" She watched as anger flickered across his face, but she paid no attention, twirling his hair in her fingers. "You've given me nothing but vague answers. I at least deserve the truth. A simple, honest answer, no trickery." She watched him. When he didn't speak she went to stand, but has hand gripped her hip keeping her there. She rolled her eyes and reached for the bottle again, taking a massive swig, a small amount trickled out from the corner of her mouth, and down her chin, it was making its way down her neck when his tongue caught it. She let out a small gasp. His tongue came up and stopped at her chin before he pulled back. His finger lightly turned her head so she was facing him, his eyes were dark, his voice low and almost a growl.

"Ne'emma lath. Ma ane emma."

"B-" He kissed her with such force she dropped the bottle so she could grab a hold of him, his arm shot out catching it, breaking the kiss, he sat back a smiled at her. She glared at him, holding the collar of his tunic, she whispered in his ear. "Tel'pala I em."

"Oh? But I thought we were playing games. Da'len." His eyes darkened as he took a swig. His watched her. "You come to me, bringing this." He waved the bottle in her face. "Ar tel'harel vhenan." Her gripped tightened on his collar.

"No, you just abandon. You tell people what they want to hear in order to fill your pride." Her words dripped venom as she looked at him, though he just kept smiling.

"Ma lath em, no?"

"Pala ma Solas." He placed the bottle on the ground next to the chair. He brushed her hair away from her face, his hand resting at the back of her neck. His eyes darkened so they were almost black. She glared at him, watching every move he made, her hands still on his collar. He only smiled be brought her head down, moving so his lips were inches away from hers.

"Ma nuvenin, ma'arlath."

He crashed their lips together. The kiss was hard and hungry, she could hear the low growl in his chest as he pulled her closer with his left arm. His right hand roaming up her thigh, nails digging into her skin letting a soft moan escape her lips. His tasted like the whiskey and brandy, the earthy tones mixed with the sweetness of honeysuckle. He moved his way down her neck, stopping at the nape of her neck, her voice was raspy and low.

"Solas… I swear, you-" He bit down on her neck interrupting her, another moan escaped her unwillingly and she could feel him smiling against her skin. He then slowly feathered kisses up her neck, making his way back to her mouth. His hand now reached her hip, he brought it around and let his nails drag up her spine causing her to arch into him, making her moan into his mouth. He then brought his hand down, his fingers brushing against her inner thigh while his left hand sprawled against her bare back, keeping her on the chair. Her arms wrapped around his neck, bringing him closer as her fingers tangled in his hair. Her ear twitched making the bell go off, the door opened making her duck her head into his neck. She could feel him give a soft chuckle, he did not move either of his hands, the desk concealed most of what they were doing.

"Sol- Oh, sorry, I did not mean to interrupt." It was Leliana who spoke. His voice appeared normal, though his fingers inched closer to her core, she hissed into his neck, but he kept going as he spoke.

"What can I help you with?" He slowly rubbed her nub in circles, she choked back the moan and he acted as though she was merely hugging him.

"Is she alright?" She could hear her taking steps closer to them.

"Yes, we are just… catching up as you would say." She moved her head ever so slightly so her mouth was at the base of his ear, she gave it a soft nibble, making him hitch his breath ever so slightly, it stilled his fingers for a brief moment before he continued. In slow movements she kissed from his ear down his neck, making her movements look as though she is just snuggling into his neck, when she got to the vein in his neck, she bit him. His body tensed for a moment, his hand digging into her back.

"Oh, well, I would like to discuss the tent arrangements when you have a moment."

"We can discuss it in the morning, I assure you. The inquisitor has had a little to much to drink so I will escort her to her quarters."

"Certainly, Good night."

"Good night." She heard the door close again, at that chance she scrambled out of his grasp, spinning to look at him, though his lust filled smile just looked at her. He brought his right hand up to his lips, licking them. Her eyes widened and she felt her cheeks go hot, earning a deep chuckle from him. "Seems we forgot the door." He tilted his head to the side, watching her. She approached him again, bending down to him, her hair falling over her shoulder touching his chest. She leaned in, as though to kiss him before pulling back, bringing the bottle back up to her lips, she coyly smiled at him, backing away towards the door. He raised an eyebrow at her, she opened the door and headed to her quarters, maneuvering around the large crowd that was now gathered in the hall. Most were drunk and did not pay attention to her, to which she was thankful for. Getting tired of moving around the amount of people, she allowed herself to fade step, quickly closing the distance to her door. Glancing behind her, she saw Solas leaning against the archway of the study at the far end of the hall, she pressed her back to her door, pushing it open with her foot, she kept her voice low, but let it travel to his ears.

"On era'vun, Solas." She gave the smallest head nod before disappearing into her chambers.

She overlooked the balcony, she was feeling so many emotions and she hated that she couldn't hold onto the anger she felt for him. All he had to do was look at her the way he used to and her heart just melted. That sort of power he had over her terrified her. After this long, how was that fair? He didn't see that his actions were wrong, just that he had no other choice. Her mind went in circles, after awhile, she gave up and crawled into the bed, feeling the warmth from the sheets around her. She looked out and watched the dark clouds roll by as her eyes began to shut.

What was she going to do now?


	7. Chapter 7

_She wanted to scream, but her throat was so raw that all she made was a struggling gasping noise. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, it wouldn't surprise her if she did suddenly burst into flames. She managed to lift her head just enough to see a tall, thin white man holding red lyrium to her thigh, she had never seen him before, though as pale as he was she could only assume he came from high in the solitude mountains. Catching her eye he gave a sickly grin as he pressed the lyrium into her thigh further, now drawing blood. Her head fell back as her vision blurred, her entire body was trembling and caked in sweat as her body wanted to fight back so badly but the restraints were so tight she was probably losing circulation. Something in her snapped, she felt it, as though something just turned off. Her body went limp, no longer trembling, the pain was still there though it seemed like a distant thought to her._

" _I can take it away." She looked around the room, but it seemed apparent no one was talking to her, they were just talking amongst themselves._

" _Wh-who…"_

" _Shhhhh, don't speak, you are tired. Do you want the pain to go away?" She could only muster a slight head nod. "Then sleep."_

 _She then let her eyes drift close, the heat from the lyrium still stinging on her skin, but it seemed such a far away pain._

She awoke with a jolt, instantly regretting it as her head was spinning from the night before. Looking down she noticed she was covered in sweat. It was the first time since she woke up she had memories, or in this case, nightmare about what happened to her in the dungeon. This one was the first time she caved into its will. Tearing the blankets off her she stormed towards her wardrobe, instantly grabbing her armor. Once dressed she made her way down the large steps, careful not to run into anyone as she made her way down the throne room. She briefly caught eyes with Solas, but her mood was so foul and angry, she quickly looked back to the large doors. It was Cassandra who tried to stop her just as she was about to push through the doors.

"Inquisitor." She crossed her arms and stood in front of the seeker, hoping she would drop what ever it was, but it didn't seem like she was going to. "There are more elvhen arriving than we int-"

"Seeker, this can wait a damn hour or so yes?" Cassandra gave her a shocked expression before composing herself. She never did call her Seeker, so this only meant as serious business. "I will come find you when I am done, until then." With that she turned on her heal and left.

As she walked through the yard, most people avoided her once they saw her. She wasn't trying to be rude, but reliving nightmares was something entirely different. Knowing that most of the people here knew where she was and what was happening to her. Deep down she knew there was nothing they could do, but it didn't quell her anger towards them. She walked across the bridge, heading to a small clearing she had made. It was small, but it was her own space to train, and in this case let out some anger. The sun was out, not a cloud in sight though the air told her it was still winter, as least up in the mountains. There was no snow on the ground, but her feet still had a hard time gripping the icy dirt. As she made her way to the clearing her left hand slightly out in front of her, heat fell from her fingertips as small flames melted the little bit of snow. With a surge of power she cleared a circle around her, with another surge she allowed life into the ground sprouting small flowers and bright green grass. Concentrating as best as she could she formed a barrier around the grounds, keeping some warmth in it. She looked around, admiring her work, it had been a long time since she stood here, it was her sanctuary away from it all, though many knew of this spot, no one came to her unless it was necessary. Sitting on her knees, she placed her hands on top of each other on her lap, breathing in, she began to meditate, or as best as she could. It wasn't long before her ear twitched, sensing that someone was approaching her from behind, though their steps were quiet, as though they naturally fell silent. Drawing her ears back, she turned her head slightly though kept her eyes close.

"Is it urgent?"

"No." She could hear him stepping closer, realizing he wasn't going anywhere, she stood opening her eyes and turned to him. His expression showed one of concern on curiosity.

"What?" Her tone was bitter, then again she probably had 20 minutes to attempt to meditate.

"You seem… distracted." She gave a bitter laugh.

"Angry is more like it." She crossed her arms over her chest, she watched as he clasped his hands behind his back, something he always did. "I came here to meditate, something you seem sure of interrupting." He looked at her for a moment before taking off his large coat, revealing a plain black tunic. It was similar to the one he wore before in the Inquisition though instead of a shirt underneath, it was just his bare chest, with the blackened jaw bone resting against it. She quirked an eyebrow as he stepped towards her again, one hand was behind him the other in front of him gesturing her to come. "What?"

"You want to release your anger, I know that fighting is one of the best remedies, especially if you can direct it to someone you are angry with." She rolled her eyes, letting her hands fall to her side.

"I'm not going to fight you Solas, magic wise you are stronger than I could even imagine. I've seen what you can do angry." He remained unmoved, though now he had an amused smile on his face.

"I said nothing about magic. I am sure you could out maneuver me when it comes to hand to hand combat. Or are you afraid you will get hurt?" The teasing tone, and the raising of his eyebrow made her snap. Lunging at him, he easily side stepped, but she spun, kicking out a leg causing him to fall backwards though he just flipped over landing gracefully on his feet as she stood again. Tilting her head, she played a new angle, slowly she walked towards him, swaying her hips a little more than usual. His eyes flickered to her hips, she smiled inwardly as she knew it was working. He met her gaze once more but before he could say anything she sprinted at him again. Twisting his arm, she kicked out his leg causing him to fall backwards, she landed on top of him, her ankles crossed together under his legs, his one armed pinned above him and her one hand on his throat. She got close to his face, her voice dripping in venom and anger, though despite it all, she could feel tears prickling.

"I do not need your sympathy. I do not need you to think you can come in and save me when you turned your back. You've all abandoned me and yet you claim that you were helping me? Go through what I have then tell me it was for the right reasons." With that she stood, running a shaky hand through her hair, undoing the braid she had. She turned to see him standing, though he was watching her, she couldn't read the expression on his face. He started to walk towards her, though she held up a hand, it didn't stop him.

"Ellana… I am-"

"STOP! Stop…." She watched as he brought a hand up to her face, before he could touch her she reared a fist to his face, in swift motion he caught it, it was gentle but strong enough to stop her. She let out a contorted laugh. "You can't even let me have that." She yanked her hand from his, walking around him. Finding the center of the lot she let her knees drop harshly to the ground, hissing in the sudden pain before breathing once more. She heard him settle beside her, opening one eye she glanced at him, he was in the same stance as her, his eyes were closed as he breathed in through his nose. Sensing that she was looking at him, the corner of his lip twitched.

"If you wish to stare I can sit in a more comfortable position." Huffing, she closed her eyes earning a small chuckle from him. After a couple minutes she felt almost restless, opening her eyes once more she stared in front of her. She watched as the small bits of snow melted against the barrier around them, turning into a soft mist. Her voice was barley a whisper.

"It was a nightmare. From when I was still in the dungeons." She heard him take a sharp breath, but she didn't move her eyes, they kept focused on the falling snow. "There was this man, human. Tall, thin, and paler than snow. His eyes, the sent fear through me, even more so than what the lyrium was doing. It was the first time the demon spoke to me. It promised to ease the pain, to take away the loneliness, after so long I wished for nothing more. When awoke, I was angry once more. Angry that everyone around me claims they did this to save me, they all in their own way love me. I don't believe it. Any of it. They left me to rot in a cell, chained like an animal all because they couldn't understand what was wrong." She let her hands ball into fists, feeling the magic come to life. "I was heartbroken because the one person I trusted the most abandoned me for his own pride and self gain. He abandoned me because he thought I could not be trusted nor would follow him in his footsteps, or at least help in any way. When he left, I was angry, I had every right to be, and instead of helping me, instead of letting me be sad, they threw me away and said there was something wrong with me. Over time it was their doing that gave me strength to give to the demon. When I wake? I find I must beg the same man to left me to save me. I come back to everyone treating me as though nothing happened, as though everything is fine." Finally, she turned to him, the magic was now thrumming against her veins begging to be let out. "Nothing is fine! I was cast out when I was no longer of use, by you, by the Inquisition, by the council, hell my own clan would be disappointed in me!" He went to speak but she pointed a finger in his face, warning him. "Then you finally show up, taking my offer, finally seeing reason after what? After seeing me almost dead? After seeing the fact, you would have killed not only your people but the spirts you were trying to save? When did your own pride stop telling you what to do? Then you act as though you want me again, saying things that should only be said to lovers, or are you just using me for your own gain?" She stood, her entire body was trembling. "I was left to rot in a small cell with no hope, with no one to tell me that they were trying and then thrown back in as though everything is fine again!" She was now shouting, at him she didn't know, she just needed to let something out. She watched as he stood, slowly as though not to make sudden movements. He walked to her, his palms face up as though to surrender, he then pointed to her hands, hesitantly she raised them to him, sparks were flying around her hands. Gently, he placed his hands on top of hers.

"I turned away from you because I thought you could not possibly understand why I had to go through with his. I didn't want you to walk the same path as me for the reason you would lose your families and friends. When you told me your plan, I was beyond happy, after what I did to you, you still were willing to help. If I had known what was being done to you…" His eyes went dark for a second before turning a silver blue. "I would have saved you Ellana. Not once has my heart wavered from you, I truly believed I did not deserve your love, that I was incapable, especially of who I am." She felt the magic slowly melt away from her, the sparks slowly died, her body stopped trembling. His hand brushed along her cheek, making her sigh. "Vhenan, I meant what I said last night, ne'emma lath. Ma ane emma."

He brought her into an embrace holding her tight as she let her tears fall for the first time in awhile. She clutched to his tunic, aware that she was crying into his bare chest if anything. She hated how with as much anger as she felt, he could make it melt just as fast. She all but screamed into his chest and he stood there, arms around her keeping the world away. It was the first time she truly felt safe after everything. A small part of her wanted to fight him, push him away and just walk away from him, from it all. It's when something in her clicked. She pushed back slightly off of him, he brushed her hair out of her face.

"The Arbor Wilds."

"What about them?" He looked at her confused but kept playing with her hair.

"Mythal's temple, the one that was surrounded by the waterfall? Where the Well of Sorrow was." His eyes flickered to hers for a moment.

"The one you drank from?" She rolled her eyes.

"What if we took the elves there? All of them. There is an eluvian in the Skyhold lower levels, only a small handful know about it. If we could move it outside, we could send our people there. They would be safe, protected, I would be more connected to Mythal as well." He placed a finger on her lips, causing her brows to come together.

"The temple is in ruins, to let children live there is asking for accidents."

"If we send workers ahead of time, they could clean it, organize it, have things prepped and ready." She was now smiling, pushing off of him she got his coat handing it to him. "I'm sure if one of us helped with construction it could be done in no less than a month. We wouldn't have to worry about discrimination, treatment. The elvhen people would have a place to call home, and others would have a place to call sanctuary." He pulled on his coat watching her.

"Why do you wish to leave Skyhold?" She stopped then, just before the barrier, turning to him with a giant smile on her face.

"It was never home, all it holds is nightmares and past memories. The temple could be a home, not many know the path, and with your power I am sure you could cloak it. We both wish to free our people, if we could give them a home that is strictly theirs, should we not give them that choice?" This time he smiled at her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder as they crossed the barrier and made their way back to Skyhold.

"If you are there, then I will follow Vhenan. I will run no longer."


	8. Chapter 8

It had taken no time at all to convince the elves of a new home, one that would be theirs and theirs alone. They had sent workers immediately, and though Solas wanted to go with them, he stayed by her side telling her it might be wise if he stood by her side when she told the Inquisition the "bad" news. He was right, they had argued amongst themselves for the better part, she remained silent as they all yelled, blaming each other for not doing more for the people. She was surprised Solas had intervened joining in the argument. They had all but forgotten her once again. She stood at the edge of the war table, staring at how it aged through the years. Her eyes fell on the Inquisition book, the one they had carried everywhere, and when they were in Skyhold it had its place on the table. They ignored her as she walked around the table, only Solas looked at her, his voice falling silent. She lifted the book and flipped through the pages. It was old and delicate, something that was left alone for years before being called upon. Irritation rose in her again as they continued their silly banter. She tossed the book in the center, earning a loud thump causing them to stop and look at her. She waited until they fully faced her, she noted how Solas had a small smile on his face but she only glowered at him, making it fall.

"You all argue you about the pettiness of it all." She pointed to the book that now lay open in the center of the table. "The Inquisition was formed to stand against a threat _united_. Do we look united?" She met each of their eyes, her anger was starting to boil in her blood, calming her self just enough to continue. "We did what the Inquisition was set out to do. After everything was done, you all left me to rot in a cell." She raised a hand at Cullen, making him close his mouth. "What ever the reasons were, you still put me there. Now, there is no imminent threat. There is nothing for the Inquisition to stand for, there is nothing for _me_ to do. I want to leave with my people, I want them to have a home they can trust."

"Do you not trust Skyhold?' Cassandra spat it bitterly.

"No." She heard them all gasp, not expecting it. "In time, the people will look at the elves as they did before, as though they are beneath them and unworthy. It may be years, centuries before that happens, but it _will_ happen. If I can in my life, give my people hope, a chance to be free and live a life without slavery, I will do anything in my power to do so. Would you not do the same for yours?" She watched as the anger played across there faces, though it was Cullen who looked saddened.

"Do you need any help preparing?" His voice was low, shaken with hidden emotion.

"We have already begun. We sent elves to clean and rebuild, in a week's time we will be ready to leave."

"When did you send them?" Leliana's face showed true surprise, clearly her spies had not caught on.

"Just about two months ago. That's another reason why I wish to leave, you did not even notice that nearly half the elves are gone." They looked at her in disbelief but it was Cassandra who snapped.

"You only do this for him! He comes back and in merely days you bend to his will! This is not who you are and you should no longer be making these kinds of decisions." She saw Solas about to snap, but she beat him to it.

"I do this for me Seeker. Skyhold is not my home, once you threw me in those dungeons I had nothing left. You all abandoned me. You left me when I was already broken. Yes, apart of this is for him, but that is because he wishes to see our people free once more. I am doing this because I do not feel welcome here anymore, and with you so keen on my leading skills failing maybe you should lead instead Seeker." She watched as Cassandra's face contorted, unsure of what to say. "You all want me here but you do not seek my guidance, leadership or council. You just need a face for the Inquisition and I will be that no longer. In its own way _that_ is another form of slavery and I will not bend to it." She made her way to the large doors, Solas following in step behind her, she glanced behind her, they all had their heads hung, staring at either the floor or table. "We will be gone in a week's time, I will no longer be staying in my quarters but amongst my kin. I will send word when we leave."

With that she turned and walked down the hallway. Solas stayed a couple steps behind as they made their way through Skyhold, finding the common grounds, but she didn't stop there, she made her way to the bridge, stopping half way to look over the mountains.

"Ir abelas." She turned to him confused.

"What for?"

"For leaving. Had I known how bad." She placed a hand on his cheek, meeting his gaze.

"You would have never known if it weren't for Cole. That is in the past, I will still be angry, yes, but I have you here now, that is more than I could ever ask." She let her hand fall, playing with the small jawbone that rested against his chest. "Despite it all, it was worth it." She could feel him tense for a moment under her, making her chuckle. "We get to free our people. We get to give them a _true_ home in the first time in centuries. I get to be apart of that. That in itself is worth the pain I have endured." His finger lifted her chin so she now looked up at him, his face relaxed and a giant smile on his lips.

"You are always surprising me. I should learn to not doubt you." He placed a gentle kiss on her lips, making her smile as well. When he leaned back he had an eyebrow raised. "Why though did you tell them we leave in a week's time? We will be ready at dusk." She smiled brightly, making him tilt his head in confusion but meeting her smile with his.

"I know them, they will try and plan something by the week's end. If we slip out right under their noses, there is nothing they can do." She shrugged her shoulders, as though it was simple enough. "Besides, do you really think there would be peace among them if I told them we were leaving tonight? The soldiers would be doubled and Leliana's spies would as well."

"That would be troublesome, epically if one managed to sneak through unnoticed."

"That is why I told them a week's time, they will plan, have soldiers in place to be ready to go through. This way, they won't have any chance to come, it will truly be a kingdom of elves once more." He brought her into another kiss, though this one seemed hungrier, making her gasp. When she looked into his eyes they had turned lustful and animalistic. His voice came out low and like a growl causing a shiver to go up her spin.

"A kingdom where you are their Queen." The thought hadn't hit her, but she smiled at the idea, leading her people to freedom.

"And you their King." He crashed his lips to hers once more. They stood on the bridge clinging to each other as though they were life itself, oblivious to the world around them.


	9. Chapter 9

**A.N: Fair warning, some slight torture in this chapter. Also, program keeps changing torture to torcher, no idea why.**

They had managed to get almost most of the elves through the eluvian which was in the lower levels of Skyhold, before it happened. Somehow, they had learned they were leaving that night, somehow, they had slipped on their plans. Solas and her stood on each side of the mirror, ushering the elves through, urging them to run faster and to not stop once on the other side. They had gotten the children and women through first, making sure that none were left behind before the men piled through.

She could see the Inquisition soldiers barrelling towards them, they were coming to fast for them to get through. It would be to easy for some to follow through before they could break the mirror on the other side.

As the last elf ran through Solas stood in front, before he could do anything she brought his lips to hers before pushing him through the mirror, the look of fear as he realized what she was going to do.

"Ir abelas Vhenan."

With that he disappeared through the mirror. She grabbed the edge and threw it to the ground causing the glass to shatter just in time for the soldiers to grab her, quickly restraining her hands behind her back, dragging her out of the small corridor. She glanced over her shoulder, the light glow of the mirror fading each step she took. Pain rang through her chest, the chance of seeing him and her people would take a miracle.

She was ushered up the steps and up into the main hall where Cullen, Leliana and Cassandra stood just in front of the throne. Her knees were kicked out from beneath her making her fall to ground, pain came but she bit her lip, holding back the hiss she wanted to give.

Their faces told her they had just found out not long ago, that the hurt they felt was beyond what she could imagine. The thing is, she could imagine that pain, that feeling of betrayal taken in a single moment. She gave a soft chuckle, earning a shot to the side of her face, instantly she tasted blood, it only made her smile more as she spat off to the side.

"So, this is what you do?" she looked over them though their faces never changed. "I wish to free my people and in return you want to what? Restrain them? Imprison them?"

"We could have liked more time to coordinate time to make sure everyone was safe, to make sure certain supplies were given." Cassandra's voice remined void of emotion but it only made her laugh.

"You mean you wanted to make sure supplies weren't being stolen. If you are going as far as to restrain me at least treat me with some respect and speak truths." She spat the words with anger at them.

"Where have your people gone, Lavellan." Leliana stepped down approaching her, arms behind her back.

"I see I am no longer the Inquisitor." Anger faired in the spymaster's eyes.

"You no longer deserved that title when you led an army under our noses."

"You wanted to free your people and instead you cling to his side and lead an army to a land where they could prepare." This time she laughed, genuine. It seemed manic, and maybe a part of it was, but the part that cared for her fellow companions, the part that wanted to reason with them was gone. They were no longer her friends, they now saw her for who she really was and they didn't like it.

"I freed our people. I would gladly do it again, with or without Fen'Harels help." She watched as they flinched at the name which only made her smile more. "You've all betrayed me, you've all hurt me in ways that could never be repaired, including him. Yet he still stands with me, willing to find a way, and in that we freed our people from slavery, from abuse. I led an army? No, I led people to a home they have no fear of being condemned to slavery. Ever. Again."

"Where have they gone?"

She remained silent, only glaring at Leliana. She had told them they were to go live among the forests, somewhere deep where no traveler would stumble upon them. It wasn't a lie, it was quite hard to find the Temple of Mythal unless you _knew_ what you were looking for. With the barriers, they planned up it would now be nearly impossible to find, no matter how hard you look, you would end up in the same place before, just wandering in circles until you left. Leliana grabbed a chunk of her hair, bringing her up so her knees were barley lifted above the ground.

"I will have answers." Dropping her she ordered the guards to bring her to one of the cells. It was amusing to her as they half dragged her away. The people who swore to stand by her decisions, to stand by her in the darkest time now turned their backs on her. How far the Inquisition has fallen, how much their belief crumbled at their feet. Before she was out of ear range she shouted, stilling everyone including the guards holding her for a brief moment.

"Fen'Harel will come for me, and I pray that he does not spare you." At that she was taken down the stairs once more. They tossed her at the far end of the hallway, keeping her hands bound as they shoved her into the cell. She waited for the sound of their steps to be completely faded before shimmering her hands out and over her legs. Reaching to her hip she grabbed the small dagger that was hidden. Damn fools forgot to search her.

Cutting through the ropes she fumbled for the small amulet that laid against her chest, if there was one person who would be on her side, it would be him. As powerful as Solas was, he still needed an ally, one she trusted without a second of doubt.

"Dorian?" she waited a moment before saying his name again, she knew it was late, but if her voice didn't say desperation enough he wouldn't wake. "Dorian…."

"Zathiria? You do realize it is _very_ late."

"Dorian, listen and listen close, it's urgent and I don't know how long I have." She realized she had even less time as she heard Leliana and Cassandra shouting at the guards. "Find Solas, contact him in any way, do it fast, please Dorian, he will explain everything, tell him 'Fen'Harels Vhenan ghi'la ma.' He will know what it means. I beg you don't listen to what they will tell you, please." She was standing as they opened the cell. She could hear Dorian shouting on the other end, but it was quickly taken from her. Cassandra was already walking away talking into the amulet, presumably trying to get from him what she told him.

Leliana stepped forward, taking the small dagger from her hand. With a quick movement of her hand the hilt of the dagger hit the side of her head, making her fall to her knees, her vision blurred before going black.

Opening her eyes, she found herself hanging by her wrists in the air. Her hands were tightly bound together, looking up she noticed it was chains that held her in place, she was maybe a couple inches off the ground, just enough her feet couldn't touch the floor. She was in a simple grey cotton gown; the straps were thin and it was quite short reaching her mid thigh. Her hair hung around her face, messy and knotted. Blinking away the dark spots she saw Leliana standing off to the side, an array of weapons laid out upon the table. Her mind flashed back to when she found her being torchered by the mages when her and Dorian were sent back in time. Shaking her head, she watched as Leliana picked a medium curved blade.

"This does not give me pleasure, I assure you, but I know you would not break under, normal, situations." She brought the dagger to her arm, pressing hard enough to draw blood, she held back a hissing noise, leaving just a blank expression on her face.

"You will get nothing from me Spymaster." She felt another stabbing pain in her arm, though she never broke eye contact, making sure the woman before her understood her words.

There were no windows so she couldn't make out how long she had been there. They had given her just enough food and water to make her last, but she could only assume they were growing impatient as they started to bring food and water further and further apart.

Her body trembled, fully exhausted it only trembled in waves as though to remind her of what her body had endured. Fresh wounds littered her body, she would have scars everywhere if they were not treated soon, not that they would care. The only part of her that wasn't marked was her face, some how they just couldn't bring themselves to mark her face.

She no longer had a gown on, it became a nuisance as they ran out of skin to cut, mame and tear. She heard the door open but she did not lift her head, she had no energy nor wanted to converse with anyone, she had barley spoken a word since it all began, only making small remarks here and there. Each of them had their own style of torture. For Leliana it was anything sharp, didn't matter how big or small if it had an edge. For Cassandra, it was her own fists, leaving her body bruised and battered, causing old cuts to open once more. Cullen, he mostly talked to her, as though trying to gain back her trust in hopes of her consoling in him, but she knew the game to well. She felt a finger under her chin, it was Leliana today. As tired as she was, her mind still remained strong, refusing to give into her hands.

"Do you feel like talking today Lavellan?" She all but rolled her eyes. Dropping her chin, she moved to grab another blade. It was always the same, ask the question over and over, cut her over and over. There was something in the way she spymaster moved though, it seemed almost urgent. Lifting her head, she rested it against her arm, watching the woman intently. Before she could say anything, Liliana's hand covered her mouth, making her arch an eyebrow before she felt the pain, her eyes widened as her scream muffled in the palm of the woman's hand. After a moment she released her hand, certain that the scream wouldn't come again. Looking down she saw a long dagger sticking out from her left rib. She knew that she was stubborn but she had never expected this, drawing out torture for as long as possible was the best outcome, not to kill the person for lack of communicating.

She felt a cloth being shoved into her mouth, gagging her. She held another blade and slowly this time, pushed it into her right rib. She wanted to scream again, but, because of the rag all that came out was a muffled whimper. It was then she realized the urgency in Leliana, why she had so suddenly switched tactics. Something was wrong, someone was here. It was then she tried to let her ears tune in to the castle, she could hear the faintest of yelling. Her eyes flickered back to the woman standing in front of her, her vision was blurring and spots began to form. She was losing to much blood, her breathing became hard, it was when she realized the precision, the placement of the daggers, she had pierced her lungs. She tried to keep her eyes open, willingly them to stay long enough to prove she was fighting harder than anything to stay alive.

She watched as Leliana spun around, glancing up she saw him, he was angry, but when his eyes landed on her the fury that over came him told her the spymaster wouldn't live. His eyes glowed that silver blue, the power of Fen'Harel was pouring off of him so much she could feel it in waves across the room. When it hit her it seemed to envelop her as though a warm blanket.

She had told him what she had seen in the future, where Corypheus had won. To see that done to her, she could only imagine what he felt. She noticed someone else standing in the doorway, and if she could she would smile as she saw her favorite Tervinter mage. She watched through blurred vision as Leliana charged at Solas while Dorian made a sprint towards her, she felt herself falling, noticing how the chains had been ripped apart at the flick of his wrist. He caught her just in time before she hit the floor.

He took the rag out of her mouth making her cough. She gave a weak smile at him. He withdrew the blades from her chest, the pain no longer there, but she was fading, and fast. She felt a soft wave of magic flow over her, the fibers of her body weaving back together, but not fast enough. With a shaky breath she spoke, her voice hoarse and broken.

"Thank you." She let her eyes fall closed, she could hear more shouting. There was always shouting, why wouldn't there be faint whispers, or sweet talking. Always shouting.

Always shouting.


End file.
